365 Pictures Days 152 to 162

 Now that summer is here I can hopefully really start to play around more with photography.   Winters are just so.......dark.  Indoor....depressing!

 

Day 152   3.30.25

It was bath day for Zoey!  She was really starting to smell quite 'doggy'.  We think she knew it because when we got to Tractor Supply where we bathe her she was SO excited and she literally jumped into the tub and waited for us.  She smells so clean now!

Day 153   3.31.25

Mertz loves her time with me in the office.  I still go into the office most days and look for jobs and whatnot.   She always comes to visit me on my desk!

Day 154   4.1.25

Another walk outside!   The trees in the graveyard where I most typically walk are full of gorgeous flowers!

Day 155   4.2.25

    I couldn't resist a picture to send to Jason to show the 'fluffy things' at Michael's Craft store.   I was going to put them in my hair but people were watching so I decided to behave....a bit!

 

Day 156   4.3.25

    It seemed like a good day for some caramel corn....which is something Jason loves!

Day 157   4.4.25

            Mertz is so afraid of the dog that she stays out of the living room during the day.  I have decided to carry her out and sit with her on my chair and try to help her gain some confidence.   The dog gets so excited.  They were face to face.  Mertz wasn't happy, but she did well!

Day 158   4.5.25

    Every once in a while I like to take a picture of the dog sitting next to Jason on the floor.  It highlights how much she has grown.

Day 159   4.6.25

    And another cat meets dog under high levels of supervision.  Poor Mertz.  And honestly poor Zoey.  Zoey just wants to play with the little kitty cat so badly!
 

Day 160  4.7.25

    Not a great picture at all......but the best I could do.  I was so sick!  I laid on that couch for 36 hours and only moved to make frequent trips to the bathroom.   I couldn't do anything.  I didn't read.  I didn't watch TV.  I didn't scroll on my phone.  I did nothing!  It was a chore to even pick up my phone, but Jason was at work and kept checking on me so I responded to his texts.....and when he asked how the dog was doing I turned the phone around and snapped this picture.

 

Day 161  4.8.25

    I actually made it to the shower in the mid afternoon.  I even read a little bit!   Still felt pretty crappy though!
 

Day 162  4.9.25

   I still felt like a bus had hit me and backed up to go over me again.  I spent the day on the recliner....reading and watching tv.  The dog laid on the couch and slept!

 

 

I am honestly so surprised that I managed to get a picture for this project while I was sick.  It was not intended for this project and is a horrible picture....but it does aptly show what was happening!  :-)

 

Always a lesson to learn

 Isn't there always a lesson to learn in everything?   I don't think that being sick was any different.  I actually learned or rediscovered three main things.

A Reset

It is a habit for me to step on the scales right before hopping in the shower.   It was no different that first day after I was sick with the flu.   When I first stepped on the scale that day my first thought was  honestly one of elation.   And immediately I was like, "man, I want to keep this weight loss", even though I knew that it was most likely impossible.   But I wanted to hold on to the weight loss because dude, that was hard earned loss! Jason even made the comment that 'well your stomach shrunk'.    That made me really think about what I needed to do to maintain my loss or at least not gain it all back.   

Jason and I even had a talk about it where I readily admitted that I knew that I would put some back on as I started to eat and drink normally again.   He made a comment to me saying, "Well, your stomach has shrunk so I would take advantage of that."   Hmmm, that made me think and I began to wonder.    "Could my stomach have really shrunk in the 2-3  days of fasting that started with the elimination of everything from my body.    

Not one to sit in the unknown, I started to research.   There were two parts of the stomach shrinking story: The first is to start by saying that while it is definitely possible to stretch our stomachs beyond the normal limit of our stomachs, for those who have severe weight problems.  Once they have been stretched past that normal limit it is not possible to shrink them back to the original/normal size.  But secondly, our stomach's are always stretching and shrinking as it does the job that it is intended to do, so yes, it does  technically shrink when we don't eat....it shrinks back to it's current normal size.   Is there anything we can do manually/physically to cause it to shrink any more than the normal process and the answer is no. 

So I didn't shrink my stomach. (Waaaaaaaa) It is possible to shrink my stomach to the lowest 'current' normal though.  And that I did for sure.   The one article I read did talk about a side affect of shrinking the stomach and having an empty stomach.  That side effect was the fact that an empty 'shrunken' stomach is more capable of emitting and transmitting the signals to my body that tell me when I am hungry and when I am satisfied. (Don't worry they gave long discussions about the hormones involved and the secretions from the stomach lining and all that gobbly gook to make it official.)

That made sense to me.  When I started to eat I noticed that I would eat just a bit and my stomach would start to notify me that it was done.   Let me tell you, I don't get that feeling often! I also rarely feel the hunger pang when it's time to eat.   I never let my stomach empty enough to get there.   This week I have gotten that feeling and in my fear of getting sick again I have stopped!  And you know what, it kinda feels good to listen to my body.  

Are you Really Hungry

Hand in hand with the last thing I learned was something that these newfound (rediscovered maybe) feelings of hunger and satiation taught me.   That big lesson is that I need a lot less food in order to feel satisfied.  Yes.  A lot less!    That fear of being sick and actually eating slow and listening to my body has made me stop eating a lot earlier than I normally would have.  And I have been absolutely fine.  I haven't been wracked with hunger pains.  I haven't felt anything negative.  I have been absolutely fine!   Furthermore, I have tried to not eat again until my stomach actually starts to feel a little 'hunger pangy'.  Which means I don't just eat at noon because it's lunchtime.  It's an interesting feeling.

It's a Good Thing

Yeah, don't call me Martha Stewart who used (may still use it or all I know) that as her tag line. But, being sick may have been a good thing......for my knee.  I had been having huge issues with my knee for the last half of my attempt to do the 75 Hard challenge.  I have limped around. I have moaned and groaned even as I try to get into a comfortable position to sleep.  But I didn't let up for even one, I was in a 75 day challenge you know.   I pushed through the pain.  I knew it was arthritis and that I wasn't doing more damage to it, so I felt ok pushing.   The challenge ended and I didn't want to lose what I had gained in terms of exercise.   So I kept exercising daily.   I did follow my plan for April and did some days of strength training but I was still working out.  The week I was sick I dind't exercise.  Nothing.  Nada.  Zilch.  (And I don't feel bad about it either).   BY the end of the week I could feel a difference in my knee!  I still have twinges, but it is just that, a twinge and not any real pain!  YAY!

I love the three major discoveries that I made.  It is my hope and plan to hang oneo them and continue letting my stomach have time to shrink enough between meals to allow my body to pick up on the signals.  I plan on listening to those signals.  And I hope to carry these as good lessons and thoughts through the rest of my "One Month of Winning."

 

I DID IT!

 I actually did it!  I completed the 75 Hard Challenge!  It was a long haul, but it is done and just in the nick of time!

Obviously when I started this challenge I expected to make it, but I will admit that within a few days I was doubting myself.  I doubted my ability to actually complete this!  I didn't let it deter me. I focused on completing one day at a time.  Exercise number one, water, read exercise number two, water, diet, picture.......repeat.  Over and over and over again  and the days started to wrack up and then I started to think that maybe, just maybe I could finish this.   And you know what?  I DID IT!

 

So what are my thoughts about the challenge now that it is done:

*  I learned that I can actually do something difficult.  I honestly think that I forgot what I was capable of!

* I learned that step counts are detrimental to me.  Yeah, I know that there was nothing in the 75 Hard Challenge about steps!  However, I started to see the  steps adding up.  I started to get happy as I was posting large step count days and I found myself turning away from activities that didn't garner me steps.  An upper body day where I focused on arm work and didn't have many steps......not something I wanted.  Likewise floor work was the devil!  I didn't want to sacrifice my steps.   So while piling up the step count is awesome, for me it might not be quite as awesome!

* While I never fell in love with exercise (I did enjoy my walks outside once the weather got warmer) I did fall in in love with how my body started to respond.  I could see some major changes in how I was able to handle situations.  I was able to walk longer and further.  I was able to do more work in the yard with less breaks.  My stamina improved drastically.

* I went too easy on myself in terms of diet.  I set up a diet plan that allowed me to have an attainable goal but it was not a goal that was conducive to weight loss.  It was a plan to ensure maintaining my weight.  And maintaining is good, but I need to be losing.   I am not sure what I would do if I had to do it over again.  I would still want it to be attainable but I would also want to do something that would have ensured a bit more weight loss.  Because while I did lose a LITTLE, I didn't lose a lot.

*  When I got sick and I was laying there on the couch waiting for the next round in the bathroom I literally had the thought, "What in the world would I have done had I still been in the midst of the 75 Hard Challenge.  Luckily I was 3 days past the end.  (What would have been day 78 had the challenge extended past 75 days.)  Therefore it was not an issue for me to deal with.  But it is food for thought.  The official rules of the challenge indicate that if you miss a day you have to start back at day 1.  I literally had to lay down on the bathroom floor after bouts of sickness because I was too weak to make my way back to the bed/couch.   An hour and a half of exercise was physically not possible. Even getting the reading done was near impossible I feel.   So I am torn on that rule after it's done and that experience.  Like I said, luckily for me I got sick after the challenge and didn't have to deal with that problem.

So would I do the 75 Hard challenge again.  Yes, I actually would.   I was a little sad to see it end.   I would definitely come up with an idea of how I would deal with something that honestly prohibited me from completing a day.    I would definitely set my daily diet a bit more strict.  The last thing I would do differently would be to work up a set workout routine that allowed my knee and body rest.  

Overall, I am so very happy with my experience.  The 75 hard challenge set me up with some amazing habits. It has put me on the right path for a healthy (healthier) lifestyle....and that is the name of the game!

Trying the Oldest Diet in the World

 This week I tried out the oldest diet in the world! I am being serious.  I can't think of anything older!  Furthermore, it was successful! Quite successful!  But I still wouldn't recommend it. This diet plan may be a bit too.......graphic and way too much TMI, but I have had some amazing weight loss so hey.....here we go!

The Last Hours Before the Diet

It started out like any other Sunday.  Jason and I were busy with the weekend and when dinnertime came I threw together our Sunday night dinner.  Now if you don't know, Saturday nights we eat out and Sunday night is the 'throw it together easy' kind of meal. It might be hot dogs on the grill (well...venison or buffalo dogs from our local butcher) or a cheeseburger or even a chicken patty sandwich.   So this Sunday was no different. I threw some chicken patties in the oven and I made the oh so comforting food from my childhood, boxed au gratin potatoes.  (Hey, I cook from scratch every other day....don't be a hater!)  I had some mulberry cobbler that I had made on Friday so I even had a bit of that.   All was right in my world.   Nothing was amiss when we went to bed!  But weirdly enough about an hour or so later I woke up with a stomach ache.  Quite annoying because who wants their sleep disrupted to have to go to the bathroom.  But what can you do.   I was back in bed after just a few moments.  I quickly slipped back into a somewhat fitful sleep.  

The "Diet" comes Knocking 

It was about an hour after I had originally gotten up to go to the bathroom that it hit me again.  This time I KNEW I was in trouble. I made it to the bathroom and well.......it was ugly.   Lets just say both ends were involved.   Finally I was able to leave the bathroom.  I moved to the couch in the family room as to not interrupt Jason's sleep any more than I already had.  My stomach was still hurting but I was desperately I praying that it would be a one and done kind of sickness.  

Yeah, that prayer was not answered. All. Night. Long.  It was so bad that when I would be 'temporarily' empty I would lay on the bathroom floor until I would have the energy to move back to the couch.  FINALLY at around 4 or 5 AM the one end stopped dispelling whatever foulness had been locked up in my body.  Still the other end continued to operate as a faucet and I continued my frequent trips to the bathroom because yes.....I had a severe case of the runs.  For 19 hours I visited the bathroom an average of once an hour. (More frequently at the beginning and less frequently at the end.)   Between bathroom visits I slept.  I had asked Jason to bring me some supplies before he left for work.  He brought me things like some ginger ale, a bottle of water, my glasses, phone and ipad.   It took every ounce of energy to send a few texts throughout the day.  I couldn't even begin to think about reading.  If you know me, that is RARE!  

By the time bedtime rolled around I had actually made it a few hours without a bathroom trip but still felt queasy as all get out.  I slept on the couch again once again praying that the vile sickness was on the way out and would not return.  I was lucky.  It didn't return, but I woke up feeling so sick.   I actually made it off the couch though!  I took a shower and made it to the recliner were I sat and dozed on and off all day long doing nothing more involved than watching tv. (Back to back episode of Little House on the Prairie if you want to know.)  At the 48 hour mark I managed to keep a piece of toast down. But still felt queasy and just horrible.  So here I am nearing the 72 hour mark.  I have just managed to hold down another piece of toast (Go me!) and I am feeling better still today.  Still not perfectly normal, but much better in comparison.  I finally was able to pick up my ipad and read a bit and even get on my computer....so that's a huge sign that things are getting better!

This morning when I took my shower I was right at the  56 hour mark since the start of this plague and I had dropped 10 pounds.   That's a mad amount of weight to drop in a bit over two days.  (The next day it dropped another 2 pounds...making it 12 pounds in roughly 80 hours.)

Yeah, yeah, yeah....I know that as soon as I am feeling better and actually start to eat again normally that the weight will regulate and I will go up.  But for now, I am going to focus on that one good result from this week, because this diet plan is DEFINITELY not one that I recommend or want to repeat!

 

 

Dreams and Hopes

 A few weeks ago a random conversation with my nephew threw my world into a tailspin.  It was an innocent conversation and the question he asked of me was so mundane that even I am surprised that it caused me so much angst and introspective evaluation.  Yet, it did.    What was the question?   What are your dreams.

The Dream Question

The question came out of the blue.  I was driving along with my nephew and we were having a conversation about jobs and the tough job market.  Not too surprising as I  am currently unemployed.  Nothing was out of the ordinary.   The question was perfectly natural in the serious conversation.   It was a absolutely mundane when my  nephew e turned to me to say, "Well MaryFran, what is your dream.  What do you want to do in life."     (I can hear the influence of my brother in that question for sure!)

I stopped dead.  I was a deer in the headlights. I flippantly responded "I want to win the lottery and be independently wealthy."  But in that moment, I knew I had not answered the question from inside me but had responded with a joke answer in an order to deflect.  (Although who wouldn't want to win the lottery and be rich.) My nephew laughed at my jokingly made comment but didn't let it drop and said "No really....."

I had nothing to give him.   No Hopes. No Dreams.  Finally I uttered the words "I don't have any, I guess.  I used to have dreams, but I guess I don't anymore."     His response was quick and succinct.  "That's just sad."

The Words Resonated

My nephew and I continued to have a good time that day, chatting and talking like normal.  But his words resonated within me.  That's just sad.    His words stayed with me for days.  The phrase That's just sad rolled over me while I was in the shower.  Those three words, That's just sad beat in my head, keeping time day in and day out.  I couldn't stop the words from resonating. That's just sad.  That's just sad. That's just sad.

I can't fault my nephew for saying those words to me.  He was right.  It is sad.   Furthermore,  I know what happened to my dreams.  I was once full of dreams for the future.  I had hopes and dreams a plenty.   When I was really young I had this dream of being a concert pianist.  Yes, I took piano lessons for years and yes, the dream could have been because of a series of books that I read.  (The Elizabeth Gail series by Hilda Stahl in case you are interested.)   Either the books didn't make it clear or I overlooked the need for hours and hours of practice to become an amazing piano player.  And thus that dream went up in smoke as so many childhood dreams do.   But I'm not talking about those random childhood dreams. (Although I did have them)   I'm talking about the dreams that pervade your soul.  The things that is just a given because it is intrinsically part of who you are. 

My mom once said to me, "Your dad and I always knew two things about you.  We knew that teaching and motherhood was in your soul."  They were right.  From a young age that was my most common and frequent playtime.  I had a family of children that I attended to with loving care.  I taught school to my dolls.  It was what I talked about most.   Sure I played other things.  I was especially proficient at protecting my neighborhood by patrolling it on my bicycle, most likely traumatizing the elderly neighbors with my siren that was attached to my bike.   It was the time of the TV show C.H.I.P.S and I will readily admit that I pretended I was Ponch and/or John (I can't remember which.)   But I never had any dreams or hopes of being a motorcycle cop.  Likewise, I played with matchbox cars with my brother and I never had any dreams of being a mechanic or a race car drive (although now that I think about it, I think I could be a wicked awesome race car driver).  No, those were just random play.   The family of dolls and the education they received segued into my dream.   I was bold and I followed my heart and my dreams.

However, the teaching dream ended in disaster and huge heartache.   It ended with a lot of stress.  It ended with me suffering from physical ailments...most caused by stress and not PTSD.  Ailments that are still induced and evident even to the day that I am writing this 25 years later.  Luckily it takes longer for those ailments to appear and they are much reduced....but they are here.  I can feel my throat closing even as I type and I am struggling to get a breathe..... if you want to read about that situation, read it here.

While I was dating my first husband, I had made it clear that I wanted to have kids.  I couldn't have been more clear in my desires.   He was on board with the idea and we moved ahead with our plans for 'forever'.     We never had kids.  When the conversation came up, he was never ready.  His response was always, "Lets wait another year or two"  or "Not yet, let me get such and such done first."   Always a plea or an excuse to wait.  It wasn't until the bitter end of our marriage that he admitted that he never wanted kids and that he had lied because he knew that I would not have married him had I known he didn't want kids.  (Not the only REALLY important thing he lied about in order to get me to marry him, but that's a different story.)   My largest and most intense dream in life went up in smoke.  By the time I left that marriage I was in my 40's, financially strapped and single.  Time and opportunity had passed me by. 

The loss of those two huge dreams gutted me.  They were the dreams that shaped the complete direction of my life and without them they  left a huge. I didn't have dreams anymore.  If I did somehow conjure up a dream, It was quickly pushed down, because dreams hurt.  

That's just sad.

I have known about this void of dreams for a while.  I actually alluded to the loss and the associated heartbreak on my 40th birthday post. (how can that be 12 years ago). I have felt powerless though.  It's not like you can go to the store and just buy a dream from the shelf?   But this time, with my nephews words resonating over and over within me, I determined that I was going to figure it out.  

For days I pondered and thought about it.  At first nothing was coming to mind.  I was dreamless.  It was a big void.  I was just putting one foot in front of the other day in and day out....exactly as I have been doing for a long time.  But I was determined to change that trajectory.   I finally had the bright idea to stop thinking about dreams, but to start focusing on things that I enjoy doing. Even that was difficult. But slowly over time some ideas began to take shape in my mind.

                        Finding My  Dreams

With the words "that's just sad" reverberating through my head I set about trying to come up with dreams and hopes. But seriously, where to they come from? I started to think not just about dreams, but about things I enjoy doing.   Once I started thinking in terms of what I enjoy, the first thing came to my mind rather quickly.

I do love to read.  That has also always been a given.  But I"m not not sure that's a dream.  But I filed away that little tidbit for the future. 

The second thing came to me rather quickly too.   I love to travel.  There is nothing that makes me happier than going out and exploring, be it an abandoned site, a park or a museum.  Multiple day trips are obviously my favorite, but even day trips are awesome!  I love to travel and explore.   As I thought about this love,  I realized that I did in fact have a dream lurking around in the back of my mind.  I most definitely dream of a life of travel and this dream had been around for quite some time.  In fact, I had made a travel YouTube channel ages ago and had a corresponding website for it sitting shelved and unused.  Why did I stop?   Fear of having this dream go up in smoke  I reckon.  

As I was realizing my interest in reading and a passion and yes even a dream for travel I also came to a startling discovery.  My YouTube channel does not bring me great happiness.  It had become a chore to create videos and post. (That could be because I was posting a LOT....in December I did one video per day and January through March I was posting at least 5 times a week....that's a lot of videos!)  It wasn't making me happy.  (The friendships I have made there do bring me happiness...but creating the videos...not as much....I end up more dissatisfied at the results than anything.)    I immediately stopped posting so frequently. (I really need to turn this post into a video to explain to my followers and friends there what has happened.) At the same time I realized that writing on this blog has always brought me happiness. Even though some of my posts over the years have been rather lame!    Yay,  that means i found another thing that I enjoy.  I enjoy writing.  I have always enjoyed writing.  I have dabbled with writing for years.  It is just plain fun.  I get a giddy rush of happiness when I reread something I've actually taken the time to write. (Not the slapdash posts...but the well thought out posts such as this one.)  Writing....

As I was typing that last paragraph I felt called to add another one to my list.  I do enjoy photography.   It was a complete passion of mine for quite a few years.  I stepped away from it for a while. I know that this is going to sound hokey and weird, but I carried around my camera for the last few years of my first marriage.  I made it through that rough time because of my camera and the fact that it forced me to see the beauty and light in a world that was very dark and ugly for me.  For a few years after I divorced I would pick up one of my cameras and I could almost feel the despair and depression seeping from the camera and back into me.  It was really odd. It was almost as if I had poured my sadness from those years into the camera and the camera was trying to pour that sadness back into me.  I know...weird.  But it was a real feeling and it happened almost every time I picked up my camera.  Ultimately it caused me to set my camera gear aside and turn from photography, or rather anything more than photography on my cell phone.  Just last fall I decided to step back into it.  The camera slowly lost those negative feelings, (I think).   and I felt ready again.   That is why I started the 365 picture project.  That was myself giving me the opportunity to step back into photography more seriously.  (Admittedly, I have been slow to dive in though.)

It may not seem like a lot, but discovering these four things is huge.  It's also a step in the right direction.  These four things didn't just come to me overnight.  These ideas took weeks of soul searching to discover.  Weeks of my nephews words reverberating through my head.  It has been a soul searching mission, one that is still ongoing.

What Comes Next

So what  comes next.  I have discovered a few things that could be perceived as dreams.  I have conjured up some ideas and definitive ideas on what I like and enjoy.  So what do I plan on doing with them?  I would love to say that I was selling it all and going to travel in an RV and see the world.  But life right now does not allow that.  Life right now doesn't allow for much other than searching for a job and trying to save money.  But that's ok....I have a dream and that is what matters. 

Right now I am focusing on turning my attention to what I enjoy.  Obviously reading, which I have never stopped doing.  Writing more, which if you look at the amount of blog posts for this year, you can see that I had already started to increase my writing.   Travel.  I pondered long and hard about this.  I thought about trying to do something with my mostly abandoned Youtube channel, but I honestly just don't have it in me.  It's not where my heart is.  Instead, I dusted off the website and I have been posting on there.   Past trips have been reworked (and in some cases resarched as my memories were fuzzy about some facts).  I have even gone on missions to find new things to explore, even if I can only do it via the internet at this time.  I am writing strictly for me and my enjoyment and posting it on that defunct unused and dusty blog visitplayexplore.com.  I 'travel' this way simply because it's what my life allows right now. !For how long...who knows...but right now, it is what my soul needs.  And what matters is that  I'm having a blast doing it.  Seriously, I started looking for the quirkiest attractions in Maryland and came up with a Bird Calls Phone....yes....a pay phone where you can call a bird! I had so much fun with that, I looked up quirky in Virginia!  Weirdly enough, (or maybe not if you know me) I have been to some of the quirky places.  I have actually seen the shattered bones of the Civil War Generals leg!   I have also been to the graveside of the ARM of the Civil war General Stonewall Jackson.  Yes, the arm!  His body is buried elsewhere.  Quirky! Virginia also has a house made from tombstones and an edible hame.  I am not making this stuff up!  It's crazy....and fascinating!  Hmmmm, what state is next on my quest for quirky?  

So you can see, I am refocusing on what makes me happy and brings me joy.  Somewhere along the way I lost me.  I'm rediscovering myself again It might not be a dream....but if it makes me happy that's all that matters.  And who knows,two things might happen.  Maybe one day my dream of traveling full time will become a reality and secondly maybe more dreams will emerge from my shattered heart.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

365 Days of PIctures Days 144 to 151

Some days it is easy to figure out what picture I am going to be using for my 365 project and others, it's not easy at all.  The easy days are sadly many times because I only have one picture to choose from!  But irregardless, I have made it to more than 150 days of pictures. As I was making my choices this morning I realized that I am only one month away from the halfway point of completing one year of pictures!  Isn't that crazy?   Being honest with myself, I feel as if there is a good chance that I will continue past the 365....but then again, who knows!   

Day 144  3.22.25 

 Zoey loves to be outside and is happiest when someone is outside with her.  The weather was fabulous so I threw down an old sheet in the backyard and I read out in the fresh air.   Zoey of course had to lay down beside me! 

Day 145  3.23.25 

I cut up a new batch of fresh veggies for the bird!  He came and helped me.  Of course his help is snitching the fresh veggies and having a snack! 

Day 146  3.24.25 

My living room looks like I have a toddler living here.  I have a basket full of toys, except they are for my dog!   And as with any toddler, the toys are usually strewn across the floor!

Day 147  3.25.25

I worked on my computer while sitting on the recliner this day (to elevate my leg due to my aching knee) and this was my view.  She lays on the couch and stares at me!

Day 148  3.26.25

A few years ago we cut some paddles of Prickly Pears and rooted them during the winter months and planted them outside in the spring.  That one paddle expanded to 3 in the next few years and I have talked about having a huge patch of pickly pear cacti (they do produce an edible fruit!).   Last fall, Jason brought home three prickly pear cactus paddles that he had picked up at one of the houses where he did a call at work. (He is an appliance repair tech.)   We put them in dirt to root them and will plant them outside when the weather is conducive to outdoor growth.   We were so shocked to see them grow a new 'paddle' while indoor!  YIPPEE!  As a side note, these are the same cacti that Zoey knocked over way back on Day 60 of  my photo challenge (12.27.25)...you can see carnage of that experience here.

Day 149  3.27.25

I am so happy that the cold and dark of winter is in our review mirror (for this year).  I get almost giddy when I see things flowering!

Day 150  3.28.25

I was leaving the house and Zoey knew it.  She wouldn't even look at me!

Day 151  3.29.25

We had a nice long walk on the C&O Canal near Williamsport.  We have decided that this may be the most brilliant of Geese.   What a safe place to lay your eggs!  

I am still enjoying the experience of taking one picture a day.  It is one of the best ways to remember and reflect!

75 Hard: Week 10 plus a few days,

 I really went into auto during week 10.  It really all just seemed routine.  I know, how crazy is that?

My exercise continued like clock work.  On week days I got up at 5AM and got the first 45 minutes completed and then in the afternoons I went out and took a walk.  On the weekends I changed it up a bit.  One or two days I did a combination of indoor and outdoor.  I also did one or two days of work outside in the yard and around the house.  I was doing stuff like turning the compost bins (Shoveling a 4x4 bin of compost out and moving it to a new location) and moving stuff around in the shed and starting to pull summer stuff out.  I will call that exercise/activity!  One day Jason and I went for a long 2 hour walk on the canal.   I am counting that as all of my activity for the day too!  

 Dare I say it was easy to get my exercise in?   NO!  I will not say that.  It was routine, but it was not easy.  I still woke up and pretty much immediately groaned just thinking about having to do that 5AM 45 minutes.  I still drug my feet about going outside to get that walk in.  I didn't WANT to do it, so it wasn't easy.  It was routine though and I did it!

The reading, now that was EASY!

The water was pretty routine also.  There was one or two days where it came down to 4 or 5 PM and I realized that I was only halfway through my water for the day.  Luckily I realized it early enough to easily rectify the issue!

Food.  Food is still my Achilles heel. I stayed under my calorie goal.   Barely.   So it was a win.  But my calorie goal was set at a level that I could sustain it for 75 days.  It was set at a level that would maintain my weight.   So I kept my goal....but didn't drop a pound during this week of the 75 Hard.

And with the end of week 10 (plus a few extra days), I have completed the 75 Hard.  I am honestly kind of in shock that I did it.  I learned a lot.  I made some amazing strides in the right direction toward health and a healthier lifestyle.  I.......well......stay tuned, I'll be posting a review of the whole thing and all of those lessons and thoughts.  I just have to get them lined up in my head first!

Coincidence? I think not!

 Just so you know, I am panicked. Today, at least the day that I am writing this marks three months since I have been unemployed. I’m not going to say that I haven’t enjoyed some of the freedom. Being unemployed has offered freedom in terms of time. Being unemployed has allowed me go to my mom’s house multiple times. We have painted. We have cleaned. The house is almost ready to be listed for sale. The time off has allowed me to spend time with my niece and nephews. I have had time to go for walks outside. I have read…a lot. But even with all of those perks, I am panicked.

I am halfway through the allotted unemployment.  Unemployment is for 26 weeks. Yet I do not have a job. It is not for lack of trying. I have completed a lot of applications. So far, nothing has come from them. Panic ensues!

Today, I had my normal morning routine going. I exercised, showered, ate breakfast, took the dog out for a walk and then I went into the office. You see, my job right now is to find a job. So on a daily basis I head into the office to ‘work’.   I have tried to maintain a schedule. It’s good for the dog you know. This morning was no different.  I worked on my computer until about 1:30. I went and ate lunch. And then I drove to a local cemetery and I started to walk. There is something liberating, freeing, mind clearing about walking outside. I noticed it when I ran, I had the most clear mind, amazing ideas, and epiphanies while I was running. Apparently, walking in graveyards gives me the same effect.  (Some gorgeous flowers that had budded on the trees in the graveyard!)

I was feeling sorry for myself today. I was near tears.  I was bemoaning my possible future without a job. I was worried about finances. And then my epiphany came.

It’s not a coincidence that Jason and I met at the exact time we met. Jason had just reached rock bottom in his life when we started talking online. Had I met him earlier before he reached that bottom, I can honestly say that I probably would have walked away. And by Jason‘s own words, if he had not met me when he met me, he may not have been able to dig out of his rock bottom. God brought us together at the exact perfect time. Coincidence. I think not.

Is it a coincidence that when Jason was experiencing a bout of unemployment, that everything lined up perfectly for him to return exactly when his money ran out. Coincidence? I think not. 

I see the hand of God. I can keep going with all of these “ coincidental things”. But I don’t have to. You get the point. So as I walked I stopped thinking about the panic and I started looking at the positive. 

When we got news that we were going to be laid off, my company had just been sold and was now under new ownership.  There was speculation and rumors that they were not going to give us severance. It was a new company, they didn’t have to offer us severance. However, they did. I got three months of severance. Thank you, Lord.

There are states in the United States, who do not allow people to collect unemployment until the terms of their severance have run out. Some of the coworkers I was laid off with  have had to deplete their severance first and only now after the three months have passed are they able to collect unemployment after three months. I was lucky enough to be in a state that does allow unemployment even if you have severance. (There is a cut off for the dollar amount, but I met the qualifications.) Not only have I been able to collect unemployment. The amount of my unemployment is sufficient enough that the general bills have been paid. Now don’t get too excited, I have nothing extra… But the bills are paid and I haven’t touched the severance yet!  What a blessing.

Sure, I’m panicked. Absolutely, I’m worried. But, I don’t believe in coincidence. I’m praying for positive resolution. But in the meantime, I am going to enjoy every day of unemployment and know that something good is coming my way.  I am trusting that this experience actually not only gives me a positive change emotionally but also gives me a positive change financially. I’m trusting.

I’m not gonna say that it is easy to trust. I’m not going to say that the panic won’t creep back in. But I am going to do my best to remember that all of these tough situations were resolved and it wasn’t coincidental.

So there you go, as much as I’m enjoying this time off… I’m ready to get back to work. But in the meantime, I’m going to work hard to continue to enjoy the days off. And even more, I’m going to work to trust.  I am going to trust that good things are coming my way.