I was in the middle of writing a long post about the urge to give up, updates on life, beekeeping and all things my life, health and happiness yesterday and I stepped away from the computer and poof, it was gone! ~~deep sigh~~ So here I am again! This time on the computer (I was writing it previously on my phone). This post is not getting away from me!
I'm Not Giving up
The last two weeks have been a real struggle. I have been so frustrated with my weight loss efforts. Ok, not really with my efforts. I'm frustrated with the numbers on the scale, how I feel and how my clothes fit.I have been for the last few weeks eating about 1500 calories. I've been exercising. I've been doing it! Yet I'm not losing and in fact I may even have gained a pound or two. Talk about frustrating! So I reevaluated where I am and what I'm doing. I looked back to what I have been doing in the past when I have been successful. I came up with two things. Cut calories and lower my intake of carbs.
I talked in my last post about the carbs already. I know that I can have 1 serving of bread/pasta/potatoes a day. I've known this for a while. Yet it seems so innocent to just have a small sandwich at lunch. Seriously, it's just a sandwich. However, that is true, except that I don't cut my complex carb from dinner. I'm within my calories so no harm done right? However, that is not right. For me this doesn't work. So back to limiting. I'm ok with limiting, it allows me to have my much loved carbs but still lose. (Oh heavens, I hope that this rule never changes!) I have been working to enact this change.
The second thing that I am working to change is my calorie count. I have been eating about 1500 calories. I have LONG known that this doesn't work for me, yet I keep bumping my calories to that 1500 level. 1200 calories is where I need to be. Yes, I know that seems low, but this has been tested time and time again in my life. I first discovered it while I was losing with weight watchers. Every time I tried to eat all of my weekly points, I would maintain or even gain. Likewise, if I tried to eat my 'earned points' (earned through exercise) I would gain. I had to keep my calories at the lower level. I've encountered this numerous more times over the years. In terms of calories 1200-1300 calories is my magic. That's not a lot of calories! So naturally more calories creep in...and if it's just a random day of 1500 calories I'm ok. But when one day turns into 2 or 3 or weeks worth, then I don't lose! So I'm getting strict again about keeping it at 1200!
It's working! Not fast, but I'm seeing the trend on the scales going down.
Exercise
Exercise has been really rough this week. The alarm goes off at 5AM and I have only been able to muster up the gumption to exercise 2 times out of the last 5 days. I've been just so tired, so sluggish and so unmotivated. It wasn't until about midway through the week that it hit me. The time change! My body has been screaming at me. It's been saying "It's 4AM you ninny!" It doesn't seem like a huge difference but 4AM is sooo much worse than 5AM (and 5 AM isn't fun either!)
Beekeeping Class
I went to my second night of beekeeping class. It is quite enjoyable. Ok, I love learning new things, so I didn't expect it to be anything else. However, I almost let my fear of trying something new keep me from it, but the fear was more "where to go, how to find it," etc and not fear about learning something new. I'm glad I didn't let my fear win.
Are we ready to pull the trigger on purchasing the set up and the bees? Yeah, I think I am. Sure, I"m scared senseless about the prospect but I'm ready. What may hold me up is finances and time. It will be a bit of outlay of expenses this year, and not sure we can swing it! Secondly, there is time. Ok, not really time, but the timing of all of this. Shipments of bees are happening literally in 2 weeks. Some places are already 'out' of bees to purchase. So being ready at the right time may not happen. But we will be ready for next year it not.
Weekend
We have a busy weekend planned. We HAVE to get those bare root trees and plants into the ground. We don't want them to move out of their dormant state! This is a grocery week. It is also a week to clean the bird cage. There are also a few other things that may or may not be happening!
Recipe Project
I have been working diligently on my mothers recipes. This has been a much bigger project than I first thought when I took on the project. So what is the project? Gathering all of my mothers recipes, digitizing them and compiling them together. Sounds easy and quick right? NO, it has been huge! Some recipes that are near impossible to read.
But that wasn't what made it a huge task. What made it difficult was the fact that mom never settled on any one organization system for her recipes. She had grand ideas though. My oldest nephew and I have worked on cookbooks, baking magazines and recipes a few times together and we have laughed so hard because we have come across no less than 5 different organizational ideas for recipes. Mom tried each one, but never really managed to finish any of them. The problem with these multiple organization systems and the lack of any set system is that each time she started a new system she copied her tried and true and most used recipes into the new system. So we are talking multiple versions of some of these recipes. The lack of system also caused multiples as she had the same recipe written on a card and tucked in multiple books, magazines and drawers.
Still not convinced this project was huge. Right now, I am at 450 plus UNIQUE recipes. That doesn't include the duplicates!
It has been interesting to see the evolution of mom's baking through the years. I found recipes from when we were kids. Very basic and simple recipes. I found fancier recipes that she used when she was a personal chef for some local priests. Just this past week I found the recipes from the restaurant. Yes, my grandmother owned a restaurant for years and my mom cooked there. (I also worked there doing short order, waitress and whatever else was needed). The restaurant recipes were in my grandmothers handwriting! The last evolution of my mom's baking was when she baked and sold her baked goods at a stall at various farmers markets. How interesting to see my mom's life in recipes!
So what am I going to do with these recipes? First and foremost, it is for family. For our use, for our memories. I have toyed with a book...but where to begin with 450 plus recipes!
I remain busy and active and taking steps to make my life, my health, myself the best version of me!
