I self sabotaged and I'm so disappointed in myself! Why do I do these things?
In my last post I was so excited because I actually had lost 5 Pounds. True, it was due to a stomach bug. But seriously, I don’t look a gift horse in the mouth! I was pumped because I was determined that I was going to make sure that I didn’t gain that hard won weight back! I had a plan! I planned my weekend and I was ready to see it through.
I took a day off on Friday so that I could clean the house and get everything in line. I was on the go all day! I implemented my plan. I prepared the food that I needed and I was doing great! I was exhausted by the end of the day because I was literally on the go from 5AM until 7PM! Zoe stayed in step with me all day…she was one tired puppy!
Saturday is where it went downhill. I started the day with heading down the road to see my mom. I started early and had my water with me. I do intermittent fasting so I SHOULD have been good until I got home at 12-1! I ran a few errands on the way there and I couldn’t get food out of my mind! I wanted food….junk food! Yeah, I ended up getting a McDonald’s breakfast meal. (Bacon egg cheese bagel). First of all…there was no way I was really hungry! Second of all…McDonald’s? In my mind I was thinking, ‘all is not lost, I can not eat lunch and I’ll make up the difference’. Ha! Famous last words! I ate lunch when I got home. Of course I did! Dinner was Five guys. Seriously, one burger is my full daily allotment of calories! Ohhh. And that healthy snack that I had prepared…it went out the window when we ended up picking up a cake from the store. Of course I had cake! Saturday was a bust!
Sunday was Easter. I nibbled in the morning while I prepped. I ate a full lunch. And I was honestly stuffed when I was done. I wasn’t hungry for dinner. But did that stop me from having a ham salad sandwich and a piece of cake? Of course it didn’t!
What is wrong with me????
The weekend was tiring! I was on the go for pretty much every second …from sun up on Friday until sundown on Sunday. I’m telling you…the pup mirrored my energy!
It’s Monday morning. I recommenced exercise after my week off due to being sick. My exercise and energy was totally lackluster. I know it! Mondays are typically more rough…so I’m not panicked.
I have to tally up points for the first week of April for my points challenge. It was definitely NOT the week I envisioned when I planned my challenge. But that’s ok. I wanted to plan a challenge that would allow me to compete against myself and NEVER feel like a failure! Beating last weeks number SHOULD be easy this week!!!
In the keto groups I am in there is a common phrase used that I love "progress, not perfection." I think that this is life and we have to accept that not every day/meal/week will be ideal but what matters is that you see it as a side trip instead of a new journey. You are still on track, you just took a little nook in the woods that led away from the path you want to be on and now that you found your path again just keep looking forward. You will get there if you keep returning to the path no matter what little detours you take along the way.
ReplyDeleteWhat about just relaxing for maybe a week and see if it just happens naturally? You know what to do. Eat, track weigh. Pretty simple. And not for nothing, you and your hubby have been through so many stresses no wonder this has been hard for you!!
ReplyDeleteAnd let's not forget about working from home where food is easy to get to. All tough.
Give yourself some self love :) Don't you think you are worth that ? And don't forget LiFE isn't slowing down for you to get skinny. You don't know what lies the next day. I follow a guy who lost a ton of weight and he passed away on Christmas Eve of '22 . So all that and at the very young age he is no longer here. Live for today.
Just live for you and your husband and your puppy. I think if you drop all the contests and tracking and weighing and so on you might see that you'll be Ok.
I FEEL YOUR PAIN on the question of what is wrong with you. That is something I would have done as well.
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