I feel like I am barely hanging on. Ever since vacation I feel as if I am flying by the seat of my pants and just barely! It is an odd sensation. I normally do feel exhausted as my week continues...but right now I just feel as if I’m pushing forward and getting nothing done...just scraping by. I am getting dinner cooked on the evenings...most days. There have been more ‘let’s just order delivery for dinner tonight’ evenings than ever! The house looks a wreck! I’m just feeling as if I don’t have time for anything! I don’t know what the difference is and what changed to make me feel like this ..but it is really starting to annoy me! What’s worse? I don’t know how to fix it. Does anyone have a few spare hours to give me each day?
I have been doing well with my eating. I have maintained my food intake within my calorie count. At the top end...but I’m there! I don’t eat a whole lot of complex carbs (I know that I don’t lose well if I do). I am feeling balanced and in control of this food addiction. But my weight is just hanging steady though...which is super annoying! It is bringing on lots of ‘I’m a failure’ feelings. Do I really have to go online and report another ‘stand still’ or worse a gain report with my weight. Seriously, it’s driving me crazy!!! I have tried to tweak my food a bit this week to bump me into the losing category.....I took out one fruit and switched it to a vegetable for my lunches......and I have ended up ravenous and not satisfied after my lunch...as in scrounging through my wallet looking for change for the vending machine ravenous! I found the money...but I came to my senses and realized that junk food from the vending machine wasn’t the ticket. I instead scrounged in my desk drawer and found a granola bar that I kept there for ‘emergencies’. The next day I took a new bar to replace that one and ended up eating it instead of putting it on my desk drawer. All week long. So that’s just odd to me!!!
I have walked on my breaks...as much as I can. I’m working on training and I don’t have prep time...so I have been spending my lunches printing materials for the next day. Since I am training I am on my feet all day though!!! That’s good!!! We get bike rides in on the weekends but during the week not at all....and I get frustrated because I know I would progress so much faster should I be able to have the time to ride on the trails during the week...but.......
But that’s where I stand....kinda hanging on my a thread. But I haven’t give up working on my health! I’m still in the game!
