Reflections

First of all let me say that my weight does seem to be dropping. Now let's not get too excited.   I haven't gone any lower than 2 pounds below that magic number.  (That stupid number on the scales that I have not been able to pry myself from.   And in fairnes righty now I drop down 2-3 pounds and then go back to that 'I'm stuck at' weight.  But the difference?  For months I would go two or three pounds (or more) over that weight and then drop back to that weight.  I never went under.   So I'm seeing the lower number more frequently. 

The weekends are my rough time now.   I am so busy at my job .and I've been walking with another gal during lunch breaks (it's good for me and for her it keeps her from going to her car to smoke...she is trying to stop...so a win win!!) and honestly, I haven't been overly hungry!!!   I guess I ate at my old job out of sheer boredom!!! So my work weeks are fine...my weekends are my downfall....we pick up fast food....yikes I know!!!   And I know that I could get the sandwich and forego the fries ...but I've lacked the will power!   And honestly...I could even get a salad but I don't!    

This week is different. I'm ordering and eating differently!!!!  Today is my official weigh in day and I showed down 2.4 pounds.  I want to keep that loss.  I'm NOT going back!!!!  

So I've not been exercising.  That's my lament. I miss running.  I know, crazy right?  But I just haven't figured out where to fit it in.   Jason tells me to give it time...as I settle in and relax and feel more comfortable with my job (and the knowledge that is still being pumped into my head doesn't exhaust me mentally which translates into physical lethargy) that I will figure it out. Plus I'm sure there are some more changes coming in the future that may make it easier!  But this has brought a few new thoughts into play.

One

The first time I lost the weight I wasn't heavy into exercise.   Yeah, I still rode my bike on occasion. Yeah,   I may have done an exercise video here and there.  But I wasn't hard core exercise.   It wasn't until I was looking at maintainance and then started regaining that I dove headfirst into exercise.  That gives me peace about my current 'just not working for me' status with exercise.   I know it's important.  I know I need it!  I know I want to do it.  But it's not a deal breaker in terms of success in this weight loss journey!

Two

Just a theory?  Was the running and heavier exercise making me me hungy and driving me toward more food and thereby counter acting my efforts?  I don't have an answer to this one.   But when I do figure this exercise thing out, I will be watching my intake of food and monitoring it more closely!!!  

Three

Let me start by saying that for years I've had feet problems (wow...like for over 30 years...dang I feel old!).  I refer to it as 'The Bone'.    (It actually looks like I have two ankles...and that lower bone is where the issues are...the bone and the tendons and ligaments around that bone).  Typically, I can deal with it and just have accepted foot pain as my friend and keep trucking.  But every once in a while they just plain and simple hurt...bad!  Very rarely did I have to turn around on a run and not complete the run because of The Bone.   Very rarely.....like maybe two or three times.  The Bone hadn't given me much grief in quite a few years.   In fact I almost completely stopped thinking about The Bone.    But within the last month or so The Bone has made its reappearance.   And boy does it hurt!   I wracked my brains to figure out why.  Is it due to a change in weather?  Is it some kind of weird your almost 45 but lets have a shift in your body....an adult growth spurt?   But then I realized the most likely cause.  Lack of exercise!!!!!  Well shucks!!!! Maybe the running was helping The Bone!!    I have no clue if that's it, but it certainly fits!

So onward and upward.   Making the best out of what I have and can do at this exact moment!!!

  

Exhausting

Learning a new job is exhausting!   My work week is me working...me seeing Jason for maybe 20-30 minutes.  Me coming home and grabbing a bite to eat.  Me staring vacantly at the wall until I fall asleep...which I'm embarrassed to say is usually by 9pm!!!!  Wash rinse repeat!

I don't work on my dollhouse, and I'm to the fun part in the kitchen .....putting in some of the wee little personal touches to make it seem real. (Trim work and cleaning up some things are still needed in this picture!)

Seriously....I bought a toaster last weekend (with two slices of bread!) and it's still in its original packaging....not in the kitchen!!!!!  That's tiredness!!!

Its tiredness that made me reach for my gearshift the other day to go from first to second and I started to pull the emergency break!  Hahaha. Yeah...mentally wiped out!!!

But the good news....this aspect of what I'm being trained on seems to be getting a bit easier.   So maybe.....

I keep saying I'm going to figure out exercise......still haven't figured that out.   I have been walking on my breaks and lunch.   The breaks really isn't much walking....by the time we take the elevator to the lobby and walk out of the building we are down to 10 minutes and then we have to return to our desks which takes 5 minutes.  But hey...we are moving!!!!!!   And we do walk at lunch!  Right now in training mode my lunches are the same time as the other new hire.   Eventually that will change but by then the walking habit will be well formed...hopefully.     I see one guy on my team head down the steps at the end of his shift....maybe I should start taking the steps down...and up!   I told my walking buddy that when it's raining or cold that we are going to do the steps!  She looked at me and said 'are you nuts?'  Little does she know that, yes...I probably am!!!

My eating...not perfect...not horrible.  Holding steady at my 'go to weight'   That weight I've been stuck at for ever!  

So nothing new to report.  Just hanging in and giving my body time to adjust to learning and yes the commute.  Yup...audio books are the way to go for a commute.  I actually look forward to the drive so that I can listen to the next couple chapters!  (Good books work!  I tried one book that was horrible and I hated it!!).  And yes...I'm wondering if I can talk Jason into listening to the next few chapters of the book I'm listening to while we are driving this weekend....seriously...the next chapter should be with the DNA tests results coming in and I wanna know what the results  are!!!!!!  But alas...6ish on Monday morning I'll be sipping my water , driving down the road and listening!!!  (Hmmm I should probably check out a new audio book too because I'm nearing the end of my current one!)

And my friend at work is telling me to drink infused water/detox stuff.   Water...lemon...apple cider vinegar...cucumber...ginger...and mint.   (Two bottles a day!)

Meanwhile Jason is telling me to drink Matcha Tea!   

I'll be floating if I do it all!!!!!

Placeholder

Just checking in.....writing a post as a placeholder to say that I'm not off the weight loss wagon.   But I'm not exactly on the wagon!   

I'm eating really healthy and good for breakfast and lunch.  Dinner is a bit rocky some days!

Exercise...non existent!

My weight.  Well, it's hanging in there.  My low low weight from last week was just a passing trend.   This week I've managed to be a pound lower than the weight that I've been stuck at.   So a victory because I'm lower than that weight...but sad because I'm not at the super low weight from last week.   

But like I said last week...life is catawompus and I'm not expecting anything to remain the same with my weight!

So what are my plans?????   Right now I'm just holding on tight.    I'm trying to get used to the commute and learn a new job.  But the biggest thing that I'm trying to work around is that I'm exhausted!  My alarm is only set for 30 minutes earlier than it's been set at for the last 10 years.  And honestly I was almost always awake by the earlier time anyway....so my sleep patterns shouldn't be all whacked out. But they are.  I've been awakening one to two hours before my alarm...wide awake and unable to go back to sleep (or if I do it's within the last 15 minutes before the alarm goes off!).   So then by 8PM I'm struggling to stay awake!   I fight sleep each night because seriously if I let myself sleep at 8PM 3:30-4AM will seem like sleeping in!!!!     So with my sleep patterns all messed up, On top of the stress and mental tiredness of learning a new job, on top of adjusting to a commute........yeah I'm just hanging on for dear life.

So it's 9:07PM and I suspect if I type too much longer that there will be nothing coherent (if even what I've already written is coherent at all)..so I will stop!!!!!

Gift horse

Who knows??  I certainly don't!!!  But for some reason my weight has dropped this week....I'm talking 3-4 pounds since Monday.   What????

What have I been doing???? 

Well it certainly hasn't been exercise!!!!! 

Eating?   My routine has been a bowl of cereal or some toast in the morning (I grabbed a muffin one morning in the cafeteria....delicious.....very moist and tasty....not a good thing for me to know!)  For lunch I've been having two servings of fruit and a protein/snack bar (aldi brand.).  Like this....or one of the similar ones I've changed which box I grab from each day!

For dinner I'm HUNGRY...so I've been eating pretty heavy...as in one night was a half of a pizza, half order of breadsticks and then to finish the un-healthy meal off.....I had a chick fil a milkshake.  (That puppy is somewhere around 800 calories on its own!).  Yes...I've had milkshake from there twice this week!   

Yes I finished strong this week!

Yet my weight is dropping!   Go figure!   I'm just rolling with it!   Maybe it was the stress and all of the underlying issues at my last job that was holding me back from losing?  Maybe it is nerves from the new job?   Maybe it's just something wrong with my scales.   I don't know but I'm not complaining!!!!

I haven't come close to figuring out the exercise thing in this new schedule.  (Yeah I should be running this morning...Saturday but ...well....maybe next week!!).  The only thing I have figured out is that it takes about 15 minutes for me to circle the lake that is by work building.   Why yes....two days I walked on my lunch break!!!   I do have a plan....with the commute/traffic and the strict attendance/late policy I plan on getting to work super early.   Yes I'm sure some days I will just read in my car....or on cold days read in the cafeteria.  But my plan is to walk the loop around the lake!  And on my lunch breaks when it's not so stinking hot!!!!!    That's my plan....and as for right now....those laps of walking is better than nothing!!!!!

Where am I walking??? (And proof that I walked two different days because one day looks gorgeous skies and the other is overcast)

Ths is the view from the terrace of the building I am in.  You can see the path winding at the bottom of the picture....and you can see a bit of the path in the top right corner.   It's about a mile (I think....I meant to check the distance but I forgot on the two days I clocked it for time!)

And in this picture taken from the path on  other side of the lake/pond.  

And if I want to stroll or shop...off to the right in the second picture is a little 'village style' shopping area....and a Dicks Sporting Goods and a Target.  We won't even mention all the delicious smelling restaurants in the area that I walk past!

So a very nice place to walk....and I certainly want to keep my weight loss from this going...so I plan on waking!!!

Open close

One chapter of my life is closed and a new one has opened.

What ended?  My time as a bank teller. 

  What began?   My new job.   (Sorry...no picture!).  

Last Wednesday was my last day at the bank. I spent Thursday and Friday running errands and doing all sorts of those little activities that just pile up and take time to do...I washed my quilt, got an oil change, did some shopping, purged some stuff from storage!  All in all it was extremely productive. (And expensive as my ignition on my car died....yikes!)

We spent a relaxing weekend hanging out...riding our bikes and then cleaning our bikes and chains and piling the chains up good....it was necessary after a bunch of rides that had us covered head to foot in mud!

And on Monday I started my new job.  So far so good...lots of HR stuff and lots of company overview and basic information about the job and company.   Real training will start on Thursday.  

So that brings me to my focus of this blog......weight and health.

My weight...237.  Which is on the low end for me.   But let's not get too excited.  Remember yesterday was my first day...meaning I had first day jitters....first day skip breakfast because my stomach was flipping with nerves.   First day nibble on lunch because my nerves had started to settle but I wasn't ready for a full meal.  (I ate like a pig at dinner though!)

My eating?  Not the greatest but I'm trying to fix that this week...start the new job with healthy habits!

Exercise?   I have an hour plus commute each way....I'm trying to figure this one out..  and admittedly, even though I sat most of the day...the overload of information made me so tired last night.   I sat around like a zombie!!!!

I will figure it all out...and in the meantime I just going to do my best!!!