Pretend

Let's just pretend that this last week did not happen!!!!  Seriously. 

I had a job interview on Monday morning.  

Monday afternoon I thought my teeth were going to fall out of my head with the onset of the sinus pain!

The headaches continued through the week...but I am happy to say that my teeth pain eased up.

The stress of my job and the uncertainty of my continued employment at the said job just drive me bonkers.

I tracked next to nothing.

I drank next to no water.  

I didn't run.

I barely moved.

I DID go for a bike ride on Wednesday afternoon.  I got off work at 2 and lucky for me Jason got off early too!

Oh and my eating has been not that stellar.

The week was a bust!!!!

So my weight for this week...I'm up a pound.   For the month...down a pound.  

My month of no numbers is over.  It wasn't a total bust.  It kept me somewhat on target but gave me a break.   

What does July bring????   

1.  Continued tracking....but this time I'm going to try to restrict my calories.....

2.  Continued water consumption

3.  Focus on where I want to be....not where I am!!!!

My 2017 in 2017......I managed to make the necessary miles to not fall behind in the month of June.   I didn't make up a lot of miles in my deficit...but I at least didn't drop back further behind.

Sinus schminus

Oh my aching head!!!!!!!!!    I am suffering from some sinus issues.   Yesterday afternoon I started noticing a 'sore tooth'.  But as the afternoon wore on the sore tooth became sore teeth....and by the evening all of my upper teeth are just an aching mess!!!    And of course I have the headache to go with it!!!!  There went my lunch plans for the day...because crunchy foods are just not happening!!!  Soft foods make my face and head ache but they are much better than hard ones!!!!   Reece's cups counts as soft right????  Hey...MILK chocolate counts as dairy right???  And peanut butter is derived from peanuts...nuts....protein!!!!!  Hahahaha

 

Hey...I know it's a king size....but seriously....it's been a rough morning!!!!  Stressful in some ways....for reasons that I can't go into now.....and of course the not feeling well....and  then coming to work where it's stress filled just is the icing on the cake!!!

My eating has been pretty steady. ....steady at my maintain level of food consumption.    And that's ok.   It's under control for the most part.

Exercise...it's going ok.  I'm moving...maybe not as much as I could....but I'm moving.   I did miss a run last week due to a problem with my foot (it's been an ongoing problem for years).  

Mileage for the month....as of right now I am at 168.37.....to hold steady I need 172 by the end of the month.  That should NOT be a problem!!!!  3.63 miles in 5 days....should be a piece of cake!!!!

Tracking is going well....

Water drinking....pretty good....I have missed one or two days of hitting a healthy amount of water but for the most part that's going well!!   

This past weekend was a bike weekend.   The weather was fabulous for biking!!!

 

I wish all summer was like the temps were this weekend!!!

And last but not least....my kitty cat Mertz is 8 years old.  From cute cuddly kitten to silly adult cat Mertz is a sweetheart!!

 

A smile or a grimace

Ok I know I'm a sick pup.....but I saw something on my run this morning that made me stop and think.

Yes I stopped running and took a picture....

 

Why yes it's a dead animal.  And seriously....it was either smiling in death...or grimacing.    Ok maybe that's just its normal face.  But it made me think about running.   When I see someone do I smile at them or is it really a grimace???

This morning my first half mile was rough and it definitely would have been a grimace.....I was breathing heavy from the get go.  I kept pushing through it though.   And by the mile mark I had settle down into a more controlled breathing.  And then as I crossed a street I saw someone walking one block over!   In my set route  I had one more block and then I would turn to run a block and cross over the intersection that the person was heading toward.  I made it my goal to run the two blocks and get to that corner before that person walked their one block.    So I started doing intervals.....sprint then jog...sprint then jog...sprint then jog. From point to point.  And as I neared that corner I saw that was going to make it!!!!   And then that bee-otch started to run!    I kid you not....they ran to that corner and got there a few feet ahead of me!!!!  Really?????     

I didn't stop the fartleks though...I did them the whole way through that mile of running.  (In the interest of full disclosure I will admit that two of my intervals were a few seconds of walking!).   My second mile was almost 2 minutes faster than my first mile.    Wow!!!!

So yeah...apparently I've been really bad about pushing myself to do the speed intervals...and I know I need to do it to increase my overall speed.   I guess trying to beat that person to the corner (me two blocks and they only one) was a good thing because it sparked me to push myself.   But yeah....they are still a bee-otch!!!

So on to the nitty gritty of this blog...it is a weight loss blog after all.   Today was weigh in day.   And I'm down two pounds.   Back to where I consistently sat for the last year....now to drive the weight lower!!!!  

I know I've said this a gagillion times...but I'm ready.   I'm ready to lose this weight once and for all!   I know it will mean restricting certain foods...eliminating others. But seriously...I can do this!   I've managed to mostly maintain my weight the last however many months.  Other than the last two or three really high weight weeks I have managed to maintain within a four pound radius for a good solid 8 months or longer.   I'm not looking for perfection.   I know there will be pizza on Saturday nights (we are creatures of habit and it's our Saturday night staple). And that usually gives us leftovers for Monday...and on occasional other days because pizza is awesome.  And I know that here maybe fries....or chips and whatever.  I'm ready to find that happy medium.  That happy medium where I can be a 'normal person'.  Because you see...while I know that this is a life time commitment...I also know that eating dry lettuce every day for lunch for the rest of my life is not feasible and sustainable lifestyle for me.  I am committed to finding that happy medium where I can have pizza on occasion (yes weekly) and still lose weight.  I have been eating about 1800 calories....with no conscious restricting on my part.   The weeks I ate 2000 or more I gained weight.   So my caloric restriction will not have to be a lot....so I think that I CAN find the happy medium!    And yes...that might mean that the weekend 'pizza date' might be a 'cheat meal!

Surprised

I just sat down and entered in my stats for the month.....

 

It's day 19.....and this for perfection I should have 19 star stickers (for water consumption). 19 smiley face stickers (for tracking) and 19 colored in spaces (indicating an active day)

I've done fairly well with my water drinking!!!  14 out of 19 possible stickers!!!!

Tracking....this should have been a freebie sticker for me each day..but this past Friday I just sorta threw up my hands and while I tracked breakfast and lunch I didn't track dinner! And that started the spiral...I didn't track anything on Saturday or Sunday.   Luckily for me...I tracked today!!!!    16 out of 19 possible stickers!!!

Evercise/activity?   I've done pretty good with that too....

Swimming, biking, running, push mowing and some walks.   15 out of 19 possible colored squares.

Sadly, my weight is not budging.   I'm not focusing on numbers but my calories are at a range where I typically don't lose.  I've learned that a budge of 1800 calories is too many for me.  So I shouldn't be surprised.  The good news?  This is a happy maintain level of food for me...

And even though I'm not focusing on numbers I am at 125 mikes for the month....50 more to get the necessary miles to hold steady in my 2017 on 2017 goal.   I don't think I will make up miles this month but I should be able to not lose ground!!!!

We had another awesome weekend....even though it was hot and muggy!!!!

We rode our bikes on both days. On the canal both days. 

 

On Saturday we saw a deer with two babies, a snake (which I almost ran over!) and a cool little turtle.

 

He was hiding!

On Sunday it was hotter and more humid!  We saw more baby deer (two mothers each with a baby....obviously really young based on how it was 'running'), more turtles (in the water) and big old bullfrogs.

 

We took time to stop and enjoy the nature and surroundings. So yes we stopped to smell the roses! 

 

And of course I had a kitty cat waiting for me when I got home!!!  

 

(I actually had two cats waiting actually...Mertz just likes to show her displeasure at my absence by ignoring me....but not Ethel!)

Another good active weekend!!!!

Midweek check in

Well let's see......  maybe bullet points today....

*** I forgot to weigh in this morning so I don't know where I stand.   

***I did manage to get a run in this morning.  

 

*** The run was hot!

***The run was slow!

***My eating is so so....not bad.  But at the level of calories where I don't lose (1800).   But hey, I'm not looking at numbers this month.

*** I'm doing somewhat well on my water consumption.   It could be better but it is consistently in the 'fair to good' range.

***Have I mentioned that it's hot outside?

Where oh where

Where o where is this year going????   It is flying by!!!!!

Today started another work week.  Still no answers about my job.   Still no bites in my resume.  Still waiting and pushing forward to whatever the future holds for me!

Eating wise I'm still tracking everything and I'm still drinking my water.   I've also been doing well with doing something active each day.  Baby steps.....

I was going to jump on the scales today but decided not to at the last minute.  I'm sure I had some valid reasoning....but then again it was 5AM so maybe not!!!

A new mower arrived at the house (like a gift from the mowing Gods!!). So after a two week hiatus, I will be push mowing this afternoon/evening.  Yup....that hour or so is definitely going to count as my activity!!!   

We had another awesome weekend.   We took it easy but also got some bike riding in. 

 

 So a win win situation. 

I got a 'tattoo'. 

 

Ok then...it's not a tattoo...it's from a sharpie!   He also wrote 'property of jason' on my leg.  I told him I would never wash my leg.   Hahaha.   Yeah that didn't happen!   A sweaty bike ride = the need for a shower and a good scrub!    So my 'tattoo' (s) is fading.  Hahahaha

But hey...a good weekend is always a plus!!!!

The elephant in the room

Which elephant do I speak of?????

On Monday I got my road bike out of storage....

 

Yup.  I was excited.   I looked at it.  I didn't ride it.  I pumped up the tires which were flatter than a pancake!!!

Tuesday I looked at it...but didn't ride it.  The tires looked good...held air just fine!

Wednesday ....... I looked at it.   Tire pressure a-ok, but maybe I should wait an extra day to make sure that the tire's were not dry rotted and were capable of holding air for a few days straight!

Thursday.....I wonder where my bike shoes are....hmm ok right where I thought they were.   Let me check that air pressure!!!!

Friday.   Air pressure looks good and I'm off work maybe I should go ride!   Oh wait...I am out of cracked corn for the ducks.  Better go get some more!!!

Yes that is how my week went!!!    I was so excited to get my road bike but then fear took hold of me.

I have been riding my trek a lot with Jason so I knew that at least my legs were somewhat conditioned to riding.   But I know from experience that my road bike was a whole other beast.   

I knew that my arms would be sore.   I knew that my abs would be sore.   I knew I would be uncomfortable.   And quite frankly, the clipped pedals scare the living daylights out of me!  

The sore arms and the sore abs are just going to happen...so today I overrode that excuse!!

The clipped pedals?   Well they only scare me because I'm not used to them...and you DO have to remember that you are attached to your bike or it could be ugly.    But I've been trying to not let my fears rule me!!!   And not riding my sweet road bike because I'm afraid of the pedals?   How silly is that?   

(As a side note...yes I could put flat pedals on the bike, but wouldn't that be giving in to my fear!??)

So after getting the cracked corn, I came home and geared up....and out I went.

My legs hurt (kinda weird since I have been riding...just my other bike).

My wrists hurt.  

My arms don't hurt...yet.

I didn't go far or long.   I forgot my cellphone...and thus didn't want to be too far from home.   Plus Jason and I plan on riding this weekend (I'll be on my trek) and I don't want to burn my legs and body out and then not be able to ride with him.    But I faced those first miles.   I heard my shoes click into the pedals and I rode....and I stopped at each and every intersection, unclipping and setting my foot onto the ground...because repetition will help me get used to clipping in and releasing!!!

Soooo...

 

Is she still the white elephant?   Yeah...kind of.  But the scariness faded a bit!!!!!

Defeated

It is Day 7 and my calendar looks good!  I've tracked and drank my water each and every day!!!!    I have been 'active' every day but one.   Yesterday was a simple walk around the park with Jason...but hey it was movement!   The day that I didn't do anything active or 'move' was on Monday.   I had grand plans to come home and mow the yards....push mow.  How active is that?   I made one or two passes in the first back yard and the mower died.  Dead...kerplunk....belly up! We knew the mower was on its deathbed so it wasn't too shocking!  But a new mower was not waiting in the wings....so no mowing for me.  I instead went inside and read the time away!!!

The good news????  

 

Yes I got my road bike from storage!!!! I have pumped up the tires...they seem to be holding air well.  And yes, that is where my bike is going to be stored...I don't use the couch...and should Jason come over for a visit, I will roll the bike over and lean it against a dresser.   And yes, that is my solution to not being given permission to have my bike in the garage at home. (Jason stores my trek with his bike.). Hey, I laid an old sheet over the couch to protect it!!!!

Regardless...I feel utterly defeated.   I know this is a no numbers month....but I am continuing my weigh ins.   And let me say that it wasn't good this morning!!!!   I looked at my calories to find out why I was up 3-4 pounds and my numbers haven't been that bad.

 

And if you net in the exercise....

 

See not bad at all!   My water has been pretty spot on also!!!!

So very defeated.   I'm not giving up.  I'm still going forward with my no numbers month....but I'm concerned!!  

The other defeated feeling and honestly probably the largest portion of the defeatedness is pertaining to my employment. I alluded to this a few months ago...but as time passes I'm going to simply lay it out....because I'm worried.   A month ago they made an announcement about some changes coming to our work place.   They however did not tell us what they will be doing with the employees that will be displaced because of these changes.  We have repeatedly asked our manager and we get the 'I have asked and they say they don't know yet'.   (Uhhh. This change is happening in mid July!!).   The closest office to us is where we assumed we would be shuffled to...but I have heard that they are saying that that office is over staffed so that most likely leaves that out as an option for any of us.  

I have been applying for positions at other locations in the last month.  A lot of applications.   I usually get nothing in response.   Oh wait, I've gotten two responses.....one was saying 'you don't have the qualifications we needed'. (A four year degree doesn't trump experience in regards to that office secretary position apparently.   But hey, I knew I didn't have the "preferred experience" and decided to submit anyway!    And the other response was a form letter that said 'due to the high volume of applications we will only be responding to the 'chosen few'.  (Yes I paraphrased the 'chosen few' line!)    Also understandable.    Did I mention that I got only two responses out of maybe 50 applications?  (Maybe some are in the mail.)  That fills one with a huge sense of defeat.  Course maybe straight up rejects would be worse.  Hahahaha (At least I'm laughing right?)"

Defeat....what fun!!!

But you know what??   

*** I am still applying for all sorts of positions....because the right job is out there.  Out there somewhere  is a job that I will love.  Out there somewhere  is a job that will pay me enough so that I can stop relying on the generosity of my family for my living accommodations.  Out there somewhere is the perfect job for me!!!!

***I am still tracking my food....because regardless of what the scales say, tracking my food is good because it allows me to see what I'm eating and make adjustments as I move toward a healthier life!

***I am still guzzling water...because it's good for me even if it didn't help the number on the scales!

***Regardless of the number on the scale, I am still running and moving....because I want to live and be healthy!!!!

And yes...I ran this morning.....

 

I even made money on the deal!!!!

 

Why yes I stopped running for a few seconds to pick up the quarter!!!  Two weeks ago I slowed down to pick up a penny!!!!  I got a raise today!!!

So I'm not giving up....I'm fighting the urge to give up.   There are great things in store for me, I just have to push through to get to them!!!!

Who needs numbers?

The no numbers thing is actually working for me.....I think.

Smiley stickers.   I have tracked everything thus far this month. .  Every bite!    I haven't thought about my calories and have only  given my numbers a glance at the end of the day...most days.   This morning I actually went back and glanced at my total calories for each day.   I have actually without trying stayed below 2k.  Works for me.    I have noticed that I tend to chose more carefully when I am cognizant of what I am eating and what I have already eaten for the day.  Four days down...four smiley stickers earned!

Colored squares.   I have run two days and biked the other two days!  That means four squares have been colored.   I had plans for today...but the rain may prohibit my movement plans.   Regardless....four days down....four smiley stickers earned!

Star stickers.  I have been happy with my water consumption each day.  I am tracking it on MyFitnessPal, so I do have a number for each day.   But I'm not worried about getting a certain number.  I'm worried about getting enough and being happy with what I drank!   And I've been very happy (for number people I've been over 52 ounces each day!).  So four days down....four star stickers!!!!

So far so good!    I will know more when I weigh in on Wednesday.   That is one number I DO want to continue with even though this is a no number month.   I don't want to fall off the rails and find out at the end of the month that I gained 20 pounds!   So I will be continuing with my weekly progress report weight checks!!!

We had a low key weekend.  Jason is settling into his job...getting his sleep in line for his new hours....allowing his muscles to adjust to the different work...and busy shoving all sorts of information in his head during the week.  So the weekends have been more low key lately.   This weekend we got out on our bikes.  Both on Saturday and Sunday!  It felt good to be out there!!!

 

The second day we rode on the canal, starting at Riley's lock.

 

No numbers Month

I have started my month of no numbers.    That means that I'm not determined to drink a certain number of ounces of water...I'm not aiming for a certain number of miles.....I'm not lookin for a certain pace while running.....I'm not determined to keep my calories within a certain range.  No numbers!!!

My goals are 

1. to drink plenty of water....by plenty I mean I don't want to make it to the evening and say 'wow I've only drank one bottle of water!'    "Plenty" is subjective and totally based on my personal feelings about how my day went!

2.  Track my food!   Who cares what the calories are...I just need to track it!!!  :-).  Yes, I know what I track I tend to eat less calories and less junk!!!!   Simply because tracking opens my eyes to what I'm eating!

3.  Move more!   Once again no numbers...just aim to move more!   

So to that extent.  If I managed to complete an item I would give myself a sticker.   I decided to use my 2017 in 2107 calander to keep my stickers.  So I went out and looked for some stickers.   I didn't want to spend a lot of money nor did I want to search forever, so I settled on what they had at the dollar tree that I stopped into.   The stickers were a bit larger than I wanted but I figured I would make them work!

So I have stars for water consumption.  I am using smiles for tracking.   And for exercise, I am coloring in the block!

Why yes...On the first day of the month I got two stickers and a colored square!

 

And yes I ran this morning so I already colored in my square for today....and just a FYI, I've tracked everything thus far (and my dinner since I'm having leftover pizza) and I'm happy with my water consumption so I COULD go ahead and put my stickers in place for today too!!!

And of course a hot sweaty mess running picture from yesterday!!

 

I've picked back up on the smoothie thing.   It is an easy lunch to grab and go...it's filling...and they taste pretty good. Oh and did I mention it's healthy and not high in calories??? I'm then rounding it out with some fruit and voila....a healthy meal!!!

 

This one was a berry smoothie (unsweetened almond milk. Strawberries, raspberries and a splash or two of orange juice and water and protein powder)

I also had a Reece's cup smoothie this week...almond milk, chocolate peanut butter powder (pb2) and protein powder!

I tried a time saving technique today and it worked.  Yesterday I took the time to purée my fruit (I used raspberries and strawberries because that's what I had in the freezer)....I puréed it with a splash of OJ and some water.   Then I put a cup of the purée into a freezer bag and put it back in the freezer.    This morning I threw that bag in my lunch box....put the milk and protein powder into my blender bottle and added that to my lunch box.   The purée was 

A slushy consistency by lunchtime.   I dumped that into the milk mixture in my blender bottle and shook it up.   Delicious!!    So a huge win!!!   Sunday night my plan is to purée a big batch and freeze it for my upcoming week!

So the weekend is almost here.   We got rained out last weekend and since the forecast was bad we didn't take our bikes.  But this week we are certainly planning on riding!!

Last weekend...oh it was rainy...we were exhausted so we slept!!  Pretty much we slept Saturday away!  But I guess we needed it!!!

We walked on the canal though!

 

We went to the Marine Corp Museum...which was surprisingly really neat!!

 

I became a marine...for a hot minute.

 

And the coolest thing....the original flag in this iconic picture ....

 

Is on display....

 

Yup...it was cool.  And some hot day when we don't want to be outside we may go back and stay longer!!!

And lucky me...my man is an awesome cook!!!  He cooked for me this past weekend!!!

 

And lucky me...the new weekend is almost here!!!!!