What in the world???

The last seven to ten days haven't been easy.  I lost my cat and I lost a promotion at work. (one I desperately needed to survive and not have to rely on the generosity of my family).  It was rough.  I tried to maintain my eating and tracking.  I tried to maintain the no soda thing.  I failed...miserably.

Tracking?  Well, I think there was only one or two day that I tracked EVERYTHING.  I also did end up eating out a LOT.  One night we went to the Waffle House after zumba and noticed that they had added the calories to the menu.  Paula and I both cringed to see the actual calorie count of our meals.  But we still indulged in our 1300 calorie meals (ok, wait, we split a waffle so 1100 calories).  We called it a funeral wake for Lucy.  Yeah, I know that's wrong to use my newly departed fur-baby as an excuse to eat....but we did it.  (and honestly, my emotions were whacked out...it was just what it is.)  I went out with a friend on Wednesday....large pepperoni pizza, an appetizer and a shared dessert at Uno's.   Yeah, that couldn't have been healthy. (ok, let me calculate it....heaven help us....2920 calories...one meal.  Yup!)   Lets see, I went out on Saturday night to TGIF and had a salad...along with ..... oh wait lets just talk about the calories.  that meal was 1430 calories.    Sunday night I had pizza and crazy bread from Little Caesars.   It wasn't a stellar eating week. 

Soda?   Uhhhh   Yeah, some meals I managed to drink water.....not with my Little Caesars....nor with TGIF.....or waffle house......but definitely friday night dinner out with my parents...I definitely drank water then!!!!  

The last time I weighed myself I was 253.8.  That weight makes me heartsick.  My clothes are all tight.  If I don't do something soon I'm going to have to leave the 16/18's and move into size 20's.  Something I do NOT want to do....at all.    16's and 18's (ok, mostly 18's right now) is bad enough.    I have been very lax about weighing myself.  It's no fun to see my weight sitting the same.  I will vow to do good and I don't see my weight budge.  It makes no sense....and it kills my motivation.  Something possessed me this morning to step on the scales.  So early early early when I woke up I went to the bathroom and stepped onto the scales.  I looked down.  Really?   Hmmm  245.6   That's interesting.  I did a double take because i've been in the 250's recently...so I'm not quite sure about that.  But I went back to bed.  A while later my friend texted kinda out of the blue and asked what I weighed.   I wrote back. "It has to be wrong...because there is no way I lost 8 pounds in a week."  Seriously, I must have been half whacked when I weighed myself in the wee early hours of the morning.   Sooooo  when I finally got up and got moving I went back to the scales.  I stepped on and waited.  I looked down.  243.6   LOWER (hey, had an extra two or three hours and a bathroom trip).   REALLY??   There is no way!   Something has to be off.  People just don't lose 10 pounds in a week.

The only thing I'll say is when i was in Florida back in October I was stress free and I lost 5 in 5 days.....and I was eating out and eating bad foods the whole time.....maybe I was having a rough week but maybe somehow the underlying stress that has overtaken me in the last few months has seeped away...to wherever it is hiding.   I don't know.   

Either way...I'm MOTIVATED NOW!