I saw this saying on Facebook today and I fell in love with it.
I think I made it perfectly clear the other day that I've been having emotional melt downs over the fates that I have been handed....the cards I've been dealt. I am being forced to communicate with my ex....which is ok. I don't want an enemy and if we can eventually end up friends, that's fine. But right now I don't want to have to deal with it. For goodness sake dude, let me heal some before you talk to me about your new girlfriend. Let me move on a bit and recover. But that is not the case. He is a customer where I work....so I am confronted with him frequently and whether he is doing it on purpose or is just obtuse and doesn't realize it....it stings. Last week the sting got to much. I melted down and I didn't pick myself back up. I ate away my troubles. Of course the troubles didn't go away.
So this week I am allowing my meltdowns....but I'm staying focused on where I am going......to THIN-VILLE!
I didn't eat perfectly today. I did however track it all! Yes, I had leftover pizza for breakfast! Don't be a hater! It was tasty!!! Hey, at least it was after I was out and completed a run! And why yes, I did have a Reece's Cup at work....but it was at least shortly before I went to Step/Toning Zumba!
Yes, calories tracked and I ran this morning (just shy of two miles) and I did zumba this evening. Shazaam!
I may also have forgotten my lunch at home and had to resort to eating at the local eating establishment (I work in a small town...the options are limited.....convenience store food!)
Not a perfect day (needed more fruits and veggies) but all in all a pretty good day. Because while I didn't eat perfectly.....I am in control and cognizant!
Got a bit emotional this afternoon.....but tamped it down. Ok ok ok, I was emotional until I got to zumba and then I kinda forgot to be emotional as I stomped out the feelings. So I didn't feed my emotions today! I zumba'd my emotions! YAY Another victory!
And just because people keep telling me to just 'get over it' and to 'forget about it all' and 'he is showing his true colors" this statement is for them. And yes, I know it's because people don't know what to say to me as I deal with my heartbreak, loneliness and pain at having all of my dreams, hopes and love shattered. And I am glad for their support......TOTALLY glad. But still...this is perfect and fits my mood during my meltdowns!
I am sorry for your pain and heartbreak. Give yourself some space o heal before tackling weight loss. Being aware of eating your emotions is great. You can build from there when you are ready. It may take longer than you like though.
ReplyDeleteLori
I've read that for women, the end of a relationship is like a death, and they mourn it that way, while men react at first by denying the pain and act like nothing is wrong, going out with other women, doing stuff, etc. – then, six months or a year later, it hits them and they have to suffer through it while the ex had already gotten over the worst. Ex probably wants to show you what you're missing to make himself feel better; he's not so unaffected as he's coming across, I'll bet.
ReplyDeleteHang in there...you're going through a really tumultuous time, and, let's face it...eating can be a crutch. At a time like this, it's natural to want to lean on your crutches! You're making progress and implementing great changes; the rest will come and it WILL get easier.
Sorry to hear all you are going through. I don't know if anyone's mentioned it before, but revenge is a great motivator. Get yourself healthy and thin. Give him something tangible to regret. ;) Who knows, he might be saying this shit just to MAKE you lose it/overeat/gain. He wouldn't be the first ex to stoop so low...
ReplyDeleteCold pizza for dinner is awesome! There is no just getting over it, and emotional eating right now is understandable. Don't forget to take care of yourself and be gentle with yourself.
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