Worthwhile

Whew.....what a day!  I made plans for this afternoon and thusly I worked like a demon to get my work done this morning with as little to do when I returned as possible.

 I did laundry.  (the bane of my existence...and somehow the laundry basket is already filled again!.grrr)

I cleaned the house. (and seriously, how can we go out to eat for every meal the last few days and STILL create so many dishes)  And as if my husband and I aren't bad enough, we have cats and they seem to make messes!   No, we do not usually store toilet paper on the bedroom floor.  I don't know if Frawley was upset because we were gone all day or if he was just totally high on cat nip. (combination of the two)

Frawley is the black cat on the left and WinniFRED is the torte in the middle of the shot

 I made banana bread. (It's yummy, I'm sure....I haven't indulged)

I sanded and painted the really cool coal stove door that I found a few weeks back!!!!!  I'll probably have that done by tomorrow so that I can get it to my dad  (and/or brother) so they can build the frame I want in one of their workshops.

Just as I found it

Sanded and painted

 I cooked three meals today (egg and cheese sandwiches for breakfast....with sausage for Todd; blt's and a pasta salad for lunch......tomatoes from the garden of course;   sweet and spicy chicken and homemade scalloped potatoes for dinner)

 I prepped all the fruit and veggies that I got at the grocery store yesterday. (yup, come on now...if I don't do that when I buy it, or shortly thereafter, then it goes to waste...rots away, uneaten!)  Oh, bacon is divided and frozen into single serve as is the two different kinds of ice cream)

 I mowed.  (when, oh when will our riding lawn mower be returned to us. LOL)

I picked raspberries.

I helped paint the front deck.

And I took 3-4 hours out in the middle of the day to go see a friend  :-)

  Tomorrow is my day to rest.  No more yard work.  No made house cleaning.  Just normal everyday things. (OK, maybe some laundry too since somehow I ran through 3-4 different outfits of clothes today...as did Todd).  I'll get to that right after I run (yes, I'm planning to run early) and then walk (yes, tomorrow is my morning walk with Sherry).  

I have been thinking a lot about the history of my weight loss.   I lost weight for one main reason....I've known this reason for quite some time!  I had myself convinced that losing weight would be the 'solution to my woes'.  I lost a LOT of weight.  The problems didn't go away though.  So what happened?  I regained weight. I always thought that I regained because I just stopped caring, but the other day it hit me.  I regained it because in my sick twisted mind, I somehow got it back into my head that I lost too much weight and that is why it didn't work.  I regained that stinkin' weight because I thought maybe if I just regained a 'little' of the weight that it would do the trick. I was self sabotaging myself.  No wonder I didn't really give a fig.    So it boils down to this  The problem in question is NOT due to my weight.  The problem in question is NOT anything of my doing or my fault.   Losing weight doesn't fix it.  Gaining weight doesn't fix it.   The problem lies with someone else and I have absolutely no control over it.  

So where does that leave me?    It leaves me with finding the motivation within myself.  I need to focus on the reason for doing this.  That reason being ME.  I'm WORTH THIS!  I'm worth the sacrifice and the hardship!

Another cat picture to round out the post.......

My  two old cats beside me tonight....these old girls are m babies.   Ethel is on the left and Lucy is on the right.  I keep a stack of pillows beside me on the couch so that they can lay with me.  THey like to be close by, especially Lucy who has gone deaf.    I have no earthly clue what Ethel was doing...but she laid like that for at least a half hour.  Silly cats!