What is different??

Last year I started my year and I was on fire.  I was losing.  I was focused.  I was a woman on a mission.  I felt spectacular!   Midway through the year I lost my mojo.  I started to flounder.  At first I maintained my weight but then I slowly started to gain again.  I knew what the problem was and I thought long and hard about it.

I was determined to start this year out strong.  I was going to be that woman on a mission again.  I was going to whip this fat into shape and set it running from my body.  I was so determined to make it happen.  However, that has not happened.  I’m still floundering.  I’m not losing, I may even be slightly gaining.  I’m NOT at all happy with where I’m at. 

I want this with all my heart.  I want to be thin.  I want it!  So what is my problem?  What part of the equation did I intrinsically have last year…..or more importantly what have I lost?  What is different????

The only thing I can think of is that the last week or two I’ve been totally focused onother things.  I’ve worked my full time job….I’ve done a few rounds of photos…..I designed a cd for a band.  I admit that the cd design had me nervous as I’ve never done anything like that. (it’s at the printers now…and no news is good news!).  The CD Design was fun to do.  It just was a lot of back and forth with the client and some late nights as we got down to the deadline which was when the client had a gazillion last minute changes.  It is a trifold cd jacket…so six pages of design….and they originally wanted a 16 page booklet for inside….so I did 16 pages of design…..but one of those last minute changes was knocking 16 pages down to 6.  Yes, you heard me….I had to lose 10 pages but none of the information contained on those pages.  So it was a rather large project for my first foray into CD Design.   But I can honestly say that for quite a few days/evenings I was totally focused on these other projects.  My focus has to be directly and completely on losing weight.  I know that.

CD Cover, they wanted simple and reminiscent of days gone by

Back of the CD

 The problem is with weight loss being my sole focus is that it’s not a healthy attitude.  Life happens and life has to be lived.  I need to find a balance.

Whatever the problem is….I need to get it fixed!   I have some very clear goals.

What are my goals????    I have two very specific big weigh ins to surpass.

Under 200 pounds is one of those biggies.  The other big one is for me to be  back at 180 pounds which is where my doctor wanted me and thus my weight watcher goal weight. (I will be back at lifetime status at that point).  So I have two goals that I've set up for those things…

A weekend with Donna in Lancaster…..including massages/pedicures

A weekend with Julie in Indianapolis……