The new year is here! I started out the year strong. I started out with running a 5k this morning. It was the last 5k that I had to run to complete the trilogy of holiday 5k's that I had committed to completing. These were set up as virtual events. (although my Thanksgiving 5k was an actual organized Turkey Trot).
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| Seriously, what was up with my head band....... |
While I was running this morning I was actually thinking about riding my bike. Last year I rode my bike. I enjoyed it...but stayed to pretty much the same route. I pushed through the first (dare I say awful) few rides on my new bike. I got to the point where I was out riding. I rode and I'm not going to say that it was all easy....but I will say that I was out there. Yet I hesitated to leave my normal route. I hesitated to hit the open road. I struggled. Today I figured out exactly what was the problem? I was afraid. I was afraid that I would come upon a hill that I couldn't climb. I was afraid that I would get a flat tire. I was afraid that I would get too far from home and get so tired I couldn't make it home. Looking at it realistically (and of course it helped that I was far removed from either of my bicycles at the time) I am once again blown away at how irrational fear really is. So what if I can't climb a hill....I walk. No, I don't want to walk and I've pushed myself up hills, slow as molasses sometimes but I pushed myself up every hill I came across. If I get a flat tire....well that is rough. I know HOW to change a tire, but I have issues with changing them. (my brother did give me a lesson...but I still struggled to get that darn tire back on). But seriously, even if I get a flat....is it the end of the world if I have to call for a ride??? And even more unrealistic.....if I run out of steam....there are two options...calling fora ride but in all reality I'm pretty darn sure that I would find a store of energy deep within myself. Once again it turns out my fears are totally irrational. So what do I do with this knowledge?? The first chance I get (once I get my legs back under me on my bike) when the weather gets warm....I head down a road that I don't know and I RIDE!
Good for you, Mary Fran! As I posted yesterday, "Your only limitations are your lack of belief in yourself! ". "Your" meaning "our."
ReplyDeleteYes, sometimes we have times of being more afraid of something than than the actual consequences warrant. It's not just you, I've done that too. But great that you talked yourself out of a crazy mind game into good thinking. A small victory to start the new year right. :D
ReplyDeleteI know all about fear folks think I'm brave I'm not I just refuse to let fear rule me so I run towards it out of the knowledge that if I hesitate I might not do it and that is unacceptable to me! DAMN YOU FEAR YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF ME! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
ReplyDeleteOh I know that fear! And it's actually tied to bicycles! I have a route around a big lake here that takes me about an hour and a half, and I used to think that .... what if...... All those things you were worried about, I was worried about too! Take your bike and just go for it, you won't regret it - even if you have to walk up a hill!
ReplyDeleteGood for you!
ReplyDeleteI have fears like that about going out on my bike too. Although mine are more about wiping out and dying in the 6ft ditch on the side of the road. LOL I'm not afraid of calling for help at all, I'm afraid there won't be a cell signal (it happens out here. I really hurt myself running once and I had to hobble a mile until I got signal.) But it doesn't mean I don't go out there still.
You can do it!
You are awesome! I want to walk a 5k this year. I struggle so much with my fears. Today I made up my mind that at the end of 2014, I would have no regrets. I would be able to look back and say I gave it my all! I love reading your blog, and seeing you push yourself. It keeps me focused.
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