Tuesday, June 04, 2013

Derailment

I had grand plans.  I ran yesterday morning and since Todd had an unexpected cancelation combined with no Zumba I had plans to either go for a bike ride or play tennis.  I talked to Todd and he wasn't jumping up and down with joy, but he seemed on board.   The day progressed and just from his responses I got 'the feeling'.  What is the feeling?  The feeling that it wasn't going to happen.  Round about 5PM I got the text.  He was feeling sick and wasn't going to be able to participate and by the way can we do dinner at 8 so I can finish my stiff at the studio.  

I'm going to break this down into two parts. Him and me.

Him.   I'm not saying that he didn't feel horrible...who am I to judge something like that.  It certsinly sedmed as if ge was not feeling great.  I am just saying that I had a feeling beforehand.  Probably his texts informing me of every sprinkle that fell from the sky and his updates on the possibility of rain forewarned me. Whatever, I had a feeling. Anyway,  His sicknesses come on when it's my plans...he can still do his stuff (working at the studio from 7Am to 8pm yesterday while 'sick' and he had no clients yesterday)and is usually not sick on days and events of his choosing.  It just gets old....real or conjured up, it gets old.

The real problem was with me.  I could have gone out on my bike.  I could have gone to the gym.  (No way dinner would have been at 8..but i could have gone!) I could have pulled out an exercise DVD.  I could have even pulled out the Xbox kinnect.  I could have done something!   I could have said that 8 was not going to work for dinner, that 8 didn't give me the time I needed to complete my tasks.  I could have changed the dinner plans to try to accommodate the requested dinner time.  I could have done so much differently.  However I let his 'sickness' derail my plans.  Is it the end of the world?  No.  I still exercised yesterday. Even if I hadn't, it's not the end of the world.  But I need to learn to stand up and take control of MY life and not allow ruined plans to affect the decisions I need to make in my healthy lifestyle.