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Monday, October 05, 2009

I'm sitting here in a REALLY emotional state. I was just wasting time on my computer and I found myself running through options of food in the kitchen. Options of food that I could go make or get that would fill this void within me. I thought about the 1/2 cup servings of ice cream and I knocked that out of the running. Why? Certainly not because ice cream isn't yummy and woudln't fill that void. It was soley knocked out of the running because 1/2 cup wasn't enough. I knew in my head that the small 1/2 cup serving size would just be too small. It would not satisfy my emotional needs right now. No, I needed a big bowl....no, I needed the whole carton of ice cream! For a split second I thought about the 2 half gallons of ice cream that are out in the storage freezers. The ones that I haven't divied up into the 1/2 cup containers yet. Luckily sanity overtook me before I went out and dived into one of them head first. I thought about popcorn. Popcorn.....soaked in butter....laden down with cheese. Ohhh ohhh, somehow popcorn took a wrong turn into the realm of unhealthy. PRETZELS!!! I could have some pretzels. Ohh yeah, and I could melt some chocolate and have chocolate covered pretzels! Oh, that's not healthy either is it. And that's when I realized that I was looking to self medicate with food. So I turned here...to my blog to put it down for posterities sake. I'm hoping that I can resist the urge for those ultimate comfort (and lots of it) foods. I am going to do my best to indulge in a HEALTHY (healthier?) snack tonight if I feel I really must. But I want to put it down here so if I do cave...I can look back and learn! (hopefully having it written out will curb the desire...so far no luck...but I'm ever hopeful)

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