180.6 this morning! You know..I'm kinda getting tired of this up and down pattern that I've been doing with my weight. It's getting old! Don't get me wrong, I'm tickled that my weight is going back down. I just feel super redundant. Like I wrote this post two weeks ago....and then three weeks before that......preceeded by a similar post right before that.
I have been thinking about something recently. And I'm trying to come to terms with it and what it really means to me. I'll use the pre-packaged ice cream cups taht I do as an example. When my husband pulls one out and pops the lid, he lays the lid down, grabs a spoon and eats the ice cream in the bowl. I catch myself looking at the lid...because he literally wastes a bite...ok a lick of ice cream...but it's still wasted. Myself on the other hand. I pop the lid and lick the ice cream off the inside of the lid. THEN I commence with the ice cream in the dish. And I practically scrap the insides clean. OK, I've been found out, I have on more than one occaision used my finger to get all the melted goodness off the side of the bowl. So, what's up with that. I know that I can have more. I could understand if I were eating some once in a lifetime food (or even something I get very rarely).....but this happens on normal everyday things. Stuff that I can easily have the next day....or even the next minute. Whatever. I know that it's sooo good I want to enjoy every little morsel...but why????? It's actually a very greedy trait to have, and not at all a becoming trait!
Woke up this morning when the alarm went off. And I just couldn't do it. I just couldn't push myself to the bike. SOOO now I have to get some form of exercise in after the grocery shopping and the following prep work that I'll do on the food when i get it home. What's up with that?
I lick the lid of the ice cream cups as well, but so does the hubby in our family! BUT.....I try to look at it this way; I am NOT licking the pint size carton that I use to eat! My portion is measured out and I have learned to be satisfied with that ice cream cup, even though I could eat a dozen more!
ReplyDeleteI do exactly the same thing! I do it because I love the taste & it's my one treat for the day. Like Donna, I used to eat ALOT of ice cream so since I feel deprived of a larger portion I figure I'm going to get all I can in the moment. I don't have a neutral feeling about food yet. It falls into healthy or bad categories with judgement attached to each.
ReplyDeleteIs it greed? I'm not sure but I know for me it's attached to deprivation.
I wouldn't be too hard on yourself, I lick the lid too :) I can understand wanting to gain more insight into your own relationship with food. And don't worry about posting the same things...it's a journey and sometimes on this journey we have to go down similar paths again and again until we find the right path. Maybe you need to change up your rides somehow? Or maybe you just need a break from them for a while. Enjoy whatever you do!
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