I fell apart!

Yes, I totally fell apart last night. I had made my plans for dinner and everything was carefully calculated. Well, it was all fine and good until I SMELLED the sausage I was cooking for my husband. It smelled so dang good, which initself is pretty amazing becuase I'm not a big fan of sausage. So I planned to have a bit. Well that's not all that bad becuase heck, I had enough points. BUT the extra two pieces of toast (they were weight watcher bread...so not as bad as it COULD have been) and then the extra half piece of Todd's toast......full fat version. ARRGGh. And I chased it all down with a weight watchers 1 point chocolate mousse ice cream bar thingy. Way too much. Then this morning, Todd and i were up and ready to go like an hour early. What did I do? Why I offered to make chipped beef gravy for breakfast! And the offer was accepted. I feel so bloated and yucky right now! I will say in defense of myself. I won't be eating much of a lunch. I work until noon...and we are then going to be picked up at sometime between noon and 12:15 to go get in the line up for the parade. I'll be in the parade until probably about 2:30 or so. The earliest I'll get home will be 3. Therefore a big breakfast was actually probably a good thing. I did pack a bag of cherries to nibble on at some point through my day. Todd and I usually do the parade thing and it's kinda a tradition for us to then go to the carnival the next town/burg over that same evening. It's my plan to eat before we go over there....so that I am not tempted with the yummy foods at a carnival. :-) I WILL pull it together again. ANd I WILL LOSE THIS WEIGHT!

Ok....healthy habit challenge. Forgot to take my multi-vitamins this morning. I will do that when I get home. Gotta remember...gotta remember...gotta remember. Vitamin, vitamin, vitamin, vitamin vitamin, vitamin. They say if you repeat something over and over, it will stick.......vitamin, vitamin, vitamin. Heck, I don't think that's working. I give up. I'll just have to hope to remember it at home! :-)

I woke up at 5:15 this morning. I laid in bed for a few...and realized taht i was awake...wide awake. I SHOULD have gotten out of bed and exercised. The thought to actualy do it did cross my mind. HOWEVER, I laid in bed and read through an old journal of mine. Not exactly conducive to my health.

WEll......maybe more conducive then I had previously mentioned. I kow that I'm struggling with some emotional eating things. I've bene a bit down lately...and I just want to eat away the issues. I intrinsically know that eating is not the solution....but it's so much easier to fall into that old comforting routine. The reason I'm going back and rereading the journals......trying to get a handle on some of these emotions and feelings that are causing me to feel down...which causes me to eat...which causes me to feel more down. It's a vicious cycle.

I'm also wondering if the stress of these emotions are not negatively affecting my weight loss efforts. They say that cortisol is a hormone that is stress related...which negatively affects a persons metabolism and all that! Just a thought.

Oh interesting. The bag pipe group that is in the parade every year is setting up right outside my window. They said that last year that they actually practised in our parking lot.....under our drive through canopy. How interesting. I'll have 'tunes' to work by! :-)