Preparing for my last February weigh in

We did make it to the gym. I had a pretty good workout...but I was TIRED TIRED TIRED when it was over. Yes, triple tired! I'm also seeing a remarkable difference in how my body is reacting to the work of shovelling and physical labor. In previous years, I'd (we'd...Todd was in the same boat as I) start shovelling...work for 15 -20 minutes and be exhausted...breathing hard...and have to go in the house for a break. This year is a totally different story. Yeah, after moving the heavy snow, my back is sore...but physically I'm not bee tired and exhausted. It is really neat to see how my body is more conditioned now. Kinda cool
I'm so disgusted...because without eating anything bad......and doing everything seemingly right (all my water...all my healthy foods....no cheating....exercise) I've gained 2 pounds this week! ARRGGGHHHH Yes, I know it will come off! I'm hoping at least one pound is gone tomorrow night for my official weigh in!
I'm actually hungry right now. I may head off to read in bed....I won't be as tempted to go to the kitchen and get something to eat if I'm in bed! It seems to work. I've actually got no points left for the day. I do however know what I did at the gym and I actually have 8 AP's that I earned today taht I could use. But honestly I think my wanting to eat is pure boredom. Actually I think it's simply because I'm sitting here and I know there is food out there! :-)

Tired

So, it seems that my weight has gone up this week....the day after my weigh in...and hasn't gone down! ARRGGHHH! We are talking about 2 pounds! This is so not good...I want to be in onederland soo bad! SOOO this morning, I decided that I was goign to workout twice today. I did a HARD step aerobics...for 45 minutes late this morning. Mid afternoon I went out and shovelled the 8 inches of snow for about an hour or so. Then after dinner I did a 30 minute moderate intensity workout. I'm sore....well, not really sore...but I can tell that physically my body is tired!

We'll see how tomorrow is on the scales! A girl can hope!

Weigh In Happiness

I went to my meeting. I am tickled pink to say that at the meeting I weighed in at 200.2 pounds! I soo want to be in onederland! The next day, my home scales showed me up! And I haven't gone down since! It is sooo darn disappointing! I want the scales to go down! I refuse to be upset about it...although I'm having to fight it! I think it's good for me to weigh in every day...but when something like this happens it is upsetting!

Thank you ICE!!!!!

OK, let me tell you, ice is pretty darn heavy to move! We got hit with the storm that ripped through a good part of the northeastern US. We were in the part that started with snow...and then after about 12 hours or so of snow...changed into an ice storm. I would have quite honestly preferred the snow for the whole time. My husband was sick with the flu...so I was stuck with all the clean up work by myself. It iced/sleeted/whatever for about 12 more hours after the snow. Joy joy. Well, after it was all over, I headed out to shovel. First of all, the ice had come down and effectively barred me from opening the screen door. (design flaw, let me tell you). I had to crawl out a window (it was either that or jump off the roof of the porch). I got out and commenced with the wonderful work of shovelling. 3-4 hours later, I was exhausted. I gave up and went back inside. (my cars were still not shovelled out at this point). I made plans to wake up early and go out and work in the morning.... Well, I did wake up early (for me...) and went out. Too late, the ice was even more solid!!! It was atrocious. I went back inside and waited for the lane to be plowed out...and then went back out and spent 2 more hours finishing up around the cars! I'm sooooo darn sore!!!

Well, the good news.....this morning I weighed myself (hey, I do it everyday) and I was down a good bit! (I didn't eat a ton yesterday and worked my ass off...). My loss puts me less than 2 pounds from onederland! I want it soooooooo bad! I weigh in at weight watchers on Tuesday nights...so if I can hold onto that loss...and maybe add a little more I may be able to squeek it out.....or at least be soooo close! SOooo thank you ice! Oh yeah, when I came in defeated this morning...I had worked myself up to shovelling in the am and getting a good workout...so I did a 35 minutes exercise dvd...and still went out later and did the 2 hours of shovelling. I know that it would have to be a HUGE weight loss to do it...but I want to give it my best shot!

Bad thing though...with Todd being sick, my meal plan has gone out the window...so it's requiring me to think a whole lot more about what I'm eating. I plan our meals a week in advance...and then I'm able to know my points that I'll need for dinner for each day...it helps.....but eii yiii yiii! OH well, I'll suceed anyway!

You know...yesterday I didn't drink my water...or all that I should have...in fact, my hands were swollen this morning (my rings were all too big...so I bought a cheap wedding band to wear...but it fits perfectly....as in when I retain water, the ring doesn't fit.....i'm not wearing the ring right now). And I still posted a big loss.....hmmmm NOPE NOPE NOPE....I'm not going to get my hopes up!!!! I'm just going to do the best that I possibly can!!!

Easier Said Than Done

Yes, I was totally serious and completely motivated when I wrote that last entry. I wish that I could say that I had followed it to the tee. I did exercise on Tuesday morning...and actually shovelled snow for a few hours today...working up a sweat while I did it! (I'm sore now) So I can honestly say that I've gotten in some exercise! However, I don't feel as if my eating is totally under control yet! I didn't eat much today...but my husband was sick...and that kinda puts a damper on eating in the house!

I know that I just need to keep plugging away. I ended up not going to my weight watcher meeting last night.....snow and inclement weather! I'm keep track of my weight here at home...I would have been up...by about a pound or two! I HAVE to get that off!

New Start

Ok...this is crazy...todays post is a new start..and that is the name of my blog. Oh well, it can't be helped. As I'm sure is easy to pick up in recent entries, but I've been doign a lot of introspection with regards to my diet and eating lifestyle. I've slowed down with the weight loss in the last few months....quite honestly since Thanksgiving. And that's not a bad thing...I've lost about 6-8 pounds in the last two months...which isn't anything to sneeze about. HOWEVER, I feel like I've worked the program and those results don't match with someone that is really working the program. SOOO, I've looked and I've discovered that I have become complacent with the program....I've become complacent with my workouts...often chosing the easy workout that I keep for those days where I am literally wiped out. The problem...I started doing that easy one EVERY DAY! I've decided to commit to renew myself and make a fresh start! I've been sitting on the fence! No more! I want this so badly....it is now a matter of mind over matter!

Stand Still

Yes, for the last month or so, I've been pretty much at a standstill. Yes, I've had weight loss...I've gone down about 8 pounds I guess since Thanksgiving. I guess that's not exactly a standstill. HOWEVER...for someone that has been following the program for 2.5 months...you'd expect more than 8 pounds! Well.....I admit that I've eaten some extra stuff. And it seems to be getting worse. My impulses are just going crazy! I've been struggling with exercise....quite honestly since we were on Vacation....THANKSGIVING! It's just been so hard to get into the routine. I make plans and say that "I'm gonna do it" Yet, the next day comes and I fail. Well, not technically. I have done DDR religiously recently...because doing any other exercise is like 'too much work'. That's not gonna cut it! I know it! And I feel guilty doing DDR.. I like to keep DDR for those days when I do want to move some...but I don't want a really heavy workout. Or the days that I just can't hack a really heavy workout! This shouldn't be everyday! I was falling back on the good old standby....ddr tonight. I did about 5 minutes or so and I just sat there and it hit me. If I never break out and force myself to do it...I never will get back in the routine of doing it! SOOOO I went and found tennis shoes (that is the beauty of DDR...bare feet....), put them on and there I was with my step out and I was doind step aerobics again. Yes, my legs were feeling heavy by the end of the program. But I feel good. I also did a good bit of thinking while I was goign through the various steps. I NEED to exercise religiously! I've proved that I can eat and maintain...within a few. HOWEVER for me to lose, I need to be exercising! I think it is for a combination of reasons. One...exercise is just..well a plain good fat burner! But secondly, for me I think when I am sweating my guts out...it makes it just a tad bit easier to say..."heck no, I'm not eating that extra bite....that would negate that hard work I just did...or that I will be doing!!"

Hopefully my revalation will make it easier for me to make this a good habit again...instead of one that I am just putting in the easiest time that I possibly can!

Stand Still

Yes, for the last month or so, I've been pretty much at a standstill. Yes, I've had weight loss...I've gone down about 8 pounds I guess since Thanksgiving. I guess that's not exactly a standstill. HOWEVER...for someone that has been following the program for 2.5 months...you'd expect more than 8 pounds! Well.....I admit that I've eaten some extra stuff. And it seems to be getting worse. My impulses are just going crazy! I've been struggling with exercise....quite honestly since we were on Vacation....THANKSGIVING! It's just been so hard to get into the routine. I make plans and say that "I'm gonna do it" Yet, the next day comes and I fail. Well, not technically. I have done DDR religiously recently...because doing any other exercise is like 'too much work'. That's not gonna cut it! I know it! And I feel guilty doing DDR.. I like to keep DDR for those days when I do want to move some...but I don't want a really heavy workout. Or the days that I just can't hack a really heavy workout! This shouldn't be everyday! I was falling back on the good old standby....ddr tonight. I did about 5 minutes or so and I just sat there and it hit me. If I never break out and force myself to do it...I never will get back in the routine of doing it! SOOOO I went and found tennis shoes (that is the beauty of DDR...bare feet....), put them on and there I was with my step out and I was doind step aerobics again. Yes, my legs were feeling heavy by the end of the program. But I feel good. I also did a good bit of thinking while I was goign through the various steps. I NEED to exercise religiously! I've proved that I can eat and maintain...within a few. HOWEVER for me to lose, I need to be exercising! I think it is for a combination of reasons. One...exercise is just..well a plain good fat burner! But secondly, for me I think when I am sweating my guts out...it makes it just a tad bit easier to say..."heck no, I'm not eating that extra bite....that would negate that hard work I just did...or that I will be doing!!"

Hopefully my revalation will make it easier for me to make this a good habit again...instead of one that I am just putting in the easiest time that I possibly can!

Weigh In!

Well, somehow I squeezed out a .6 loss this week! It wasn't looking good earlier this week! I wish it was more...but a loss is a loss! I have 3.8 pounds to hit 200 pounds! I sooo badly want to be in the one hundreds! I know I'll get there! Not getting there is not an option I'm willing to accept. So I know I'm gonna do it! The question is when!!

I have an interview for another job tomorrow after work. I hope it goes well..and that job is something that would work for us! It would be nice to have health insurance again! Not that Todd and I run to the doctor for every ache and pain. But I'm tired of living in fear that we are gonna need it and not have it! Thus far, we've had only small issues to attend to! (However I just had a prescription filled for this rash that was $100...generic!!! OUCH!) So overall it's been ok...we've actually spent less paying directly out of pocket than I would have spent if we had been paying for the premiums on the insurance...so it's worked out well for us thus far. However like I said, I'm just scared!

After weigh in is always my free meal...night. SO, I've eaten a nice heavy comfort foods meal! And like always, I enjoy it totally...and then promptly feel guilty for it!

No panic attacks allowed!

I'm trying to remain calm and tell myself that I didn't do anything wrong this week. It may just be one of those weeks where I don't lose and I don't gain. I'm getting tired of this cycle though. But I refuse to panic and obsess about it. THus..that's all I'm gonna say about the subject.

I have decided that my way that I sign off of emails a lot of times Think Thin...is so utterly immportant in this weight loss journey. I have to keep my ultimate goal..reasons and dreams in the front of my mind at all times. If it is in the foremost part of my mind, then it will be there side by side with the temptation. AND I can see which one is more important to me. I can't make that decision if I don't have those mental images in ready and waiting to go head to head! That way, when I do decide to eat a little something I've weighed the options..and the possible consequence (a little more time to get to goal) and I can thus have no guilt about it later! SOOO my motto is THINK THIN!

Rough Time

I'm really bummed. It is taking all I have to not just throw in the towel and say 'to heck with it' for this week. The scales keep showing me going up. It's not TOM..so I shouldn't be having a gain. My points have been relatively close...enough that I've only dipped into my flex points by a few. IT shouldn't be a gain. And it's disgusting me! I'm trying not to focus on it and just keep doing what I'm doing..I know that it will come off eventually.

However, it seems of late that I'm having a good loss...and then a maintain...and then a good loss week,..and then a maintain week. Occaisionally I'm throwing in a gain week...followed by a REALLY good loss (basically equals out to a maintain week and a regular loss week.) That's disgusting me also! I somehow have to break that cycle!

With my probable maintain/gain this week, I probably won't make onederland by Valentines day. It really sucks! I'm so close and just can't break that barrier! I've been up and down since Thanksgiving...and been within 10 pounds of it the whole time! It's killing me!!!!!