I'm surprised that I'm not eating everything under the sun. Why, because I'm stressed out about my job. But so far today, I've been a pretty good girl. I ate wisely...leaving me enough calories to actually be able to eat dinner and not being able to only eat vegetables or risk going over my calorie count. I walked on my breaks today...so that equaled to an hour of walking. AND, they left me go early from work...and I went to the gym. I didn't do a complete LONG workout at the gym. I did 20 minutes on the elliptical and 15 minutes on the weights. BUT, it was a start...and oh boy, let me tell you. The weights whoopped up on me today! It's been a bit and I can really tell!

Today

Today so far I've done pretty good. I think once I am back in the routine of actually notating my foods I'll do better. I was looking at my book today and I would write my foods on one day...but the next day would 'forget'. So nothing consistent. Honestly, one day I "forgot" because I was eating poor choices! I can't do that anymore. I NEED to do this consistently!

I dread going back to work because I hate my job. But, on the other hand, going back to work will force me back into a routine. I plan on walking on my breaks again like I was doing before and of course want to continue to go to the gym!

Still Struggling

Ok.......more than a week later and I'm still struggling. When I first started this, I was gung ho and didn't have any problems starting. I'm still gung ho, however I'm really struggling with getting back on track. I will say that in the last few days, I've started to eat healthier again....even if it is not where I want to be calorie and fat content wise, at least it's healthier.

I have to just do this!

Starting Again

Well let me tell you. Once you fall off the bandwagon, it isn't easy to pick it back up. I'm determined to do it though! I said this yesterday morning and just didn't do it. In fact, I was craving potato chips...and I'm almost too ashamed to say it...but ate the whole bag. NO, not an individual serving size...the WHOLE BIG bag of chips. Man, did they ever taste good...but I can't do that! I know it was a mental war within myself. I knew I shouldn't be eating the chips...but I was battling inside my head, "just one more". I would eat that one more...and already, before I could even close the bag, my mind was saying "only a handful more". I was no match for this mental game! I caved......oh boy did I cave!

Today, I'm not doing soo bad. The only problem is that since I've been eating the bad things....my body is wanting those bad things. I rarely suffer from cravings....but boy oh boy I'm suffering now!

But, I've got to regain my control and start again. I didn't make my end of month goal...and in fact lost a little ground over the last week (well, maybe not, I'm still within that, 'it's ok it could be water retention weight range).

I just need to use this week as a lesson to help me in future times of difficulty!

bad week

This was a bad week for my diet. On one hand I'm actually tickled that my weight has remained in the same range. BUT, this was a very stressful week, Todd and I were getting ready to go on vacation and stopped by to say goodbye to his mom. We found her in bed, delirious. APparently, the cancer in her bones was not only eating the bones, but releasing all that calcium into her bloodstream...causing delirium. From research and from what Hospice said, I knew that this was going to lead to her death. We cancelled our vaction and we started spendign 20 hours out of the day over there. It was a rough week. When we did find time to eat, it was really bad food. We live in the country...restaurants are not plentiful so we ate where we could catch a bite. AND to make matters worse, even when we were at home, there was no food....remember we were leaving for vacation so we had no food at the house...ok we had food but the basics that you need to prepare that food was/is missing. So, eating bad and exhaustion was my week. I didn't drink my water like I should be doing. Last night was the first night I slept in my bed, she passed yesterday and I weighed myself this morning. I was sad to see 2 pounds up...but tickled because that could really be water retention or something......it could have been a lot worse! But what an interesting lesson to see what happens when things get bad in my life.